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My Step-son the Slob

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Greetings fellow STalkers!

I actually had a free moment and wanted to blog about my Step-son the Slob. This is something that still irritates me, even though it doesn't affect my daily life. A little bit of background:

When DW and I got married, I "inherited" her SS (then eight) and SD (then 3). They had different bio-dads, neither of whom did much to raise their kids. However, both Bio-Dads were still around a little bit, just enough to cause trouble. Both SS and SD idolized their largely-absentee fathers, go figure.

Question about my legal liability when SD gets in trouble

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I'm taking a break from my usual entries today, because I need to get some good advice from the folks here on ST. One of my biggest fears is that SD17 will do something that will get us in trouble legally. For instance, if she steals a car an kills someone in an accident, or gets in a fight and hurts someone. If she injures someone, and we are sued, I am concerned that I will end up being responsible for my wife's half of the settlement.

DW is supporting my disengagement

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For those of you that have not read my entries, I am a step-father living with a SD17. Her mission in life is to break up my marriage. For the last few months, she consistently pushed me to the limit with her behavior. DW is a "friend" parent who doesn't enforce discipline, and doesn't allow me to parent. Up until recently, she **did**, however, expect me to help with SD17 (grades, running her around town, etc.).

DW had a good one yesterday

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For those of you who haven't read my blogs, I am a step-dad with a SD17 living with me and DW. I recently made the decision to disengage, and things have improved a good bit in the household. One thing that I used to do, prior to disengagement, was pick up my SD17's room, since she never picks it up, and because it pissed her off when I cleaned it, since I was "messing" with "her stuff." However, on the advice of fellow boardmembers, I stopped picking up SD17's room.

What's with the poor hygiene and eating habits for skids?

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For as long as I have known them, my skids (SS20 and SD17) have struggled with hygiene and eating issues. SS20, who has lived with his perfect bio-daddy for the last few years, has never learned how to take a proper shower, and reeks whenever we see him. He doesn't know how to comb his hair, never washes his face, and dresses like a hobo. He also eats like a horse. He is about 5'9", and weighs nearly 300 lbs.

Disengagement is starting to work!

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For those of you folks who have been following my posts, you know that I totally disengaged from SD17 a few weeks ago. Her mission in life is to wreck my marriage to DW, so that SD can have DW to herself. SD17 has tried every trick in the book to create tension and drive a wedge between me and DW. However, now that I have disengaged, the number of fights between me and DW has tailed off significantly (prior to disengagement, most of fights centered around SD).

My DW the doormat....

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For those of you who have read my posts, you know that my SD17 has really ramped up her bad behavior lately. She has messed with my work laptop, locked the door the her room, and has had just a flat-out bad attitude for several weeks straight. Friday night was no different, but it was kind of a microcosm of her bad behavior, as she managed to hit on several of core issues. Here is what happened:

Question about ODD

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I recently came across a reference to ODD, and looked into it a bit. SD17 has every diagnostic criteria! I am trying to talk DW into getting a pediatric pysch consult for SD, and DW is at least considering it.

Before we get too far into this process, I wanted to see if folks on this site had experience with their skids having ODD. Did getting a consult help? If there was a diagnosis of ODD, what type of treatment was prescribed, and did it help? Or did it make it worse? Any info would be great appreciated!

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