So MAYBE, just maybe there might be a solution to the insanity. Some years ago, when I had just divorced I had TWO offers from my company, one in San Diego, and one in Tampa.

San Diego being my dream city was way out of reach financially-Tampa, though better cost of living was also turned down because my kids were very young and I needed my support system here in GA (my parents mainly). So with much regret-even after researching real estate, schools, moving I turned it down and stayed.

GA is NOT a place I'm happy with for many reasons.
1) Allergies-they are getting worse each year to where I develop acute bronchitis a few times a year.
2) There is no near beach in site for hundreds of miles
3)In winter by Feb my seasonal depression gets to the point of seriously debilitating
4)the distance to everything
5)not conducive to an outdoor/healthier lifestyle
6)my neighborhood has changed for the worse in the last few years and keeps degrading-schools are getting worse, crime has increased BIG time as demographic changes ocurred-I realize this may not be politically correct but it is a very strong factor
7)There are not many job opportunities for my bf here as what he loves to do works much better in a coastal city (landscaping, motorcycle or small engine boat, jetski repair, etc)
8)There is nothing that will be changing with his parents doing this take the SD anytime BM wants for years to come-just now he was ADVISED less then 12hrs prior that SD was coming to stay w/them (ahem-him) two weeks, then two weeks w/mom then back two weeks w/them (him again) till end of summer. Which means they expect him to take over what THEY agreed to, BM sets up the schedule at HER convenience, his parents jump at her disposal and then expect him to take up for that. They do NOT realize that by law he is not EXPECTED to have her at bm's convenience or 4 wks in the summer (which his co doesn't even state) but it's his RIGHT to exercise or not.
9)No income state taxes

We started brainstorming the other day and realized that we would have a MUCH better life if we moved to a coastal city-sunshine, more work for him, better lifestyle, AND he would have more control if not total control of his life when it comes to SD.
I work for the airline industry, the offer packages every couple of years, if they offered one in 2-3 years I could take an early retirement, leave w/full flight benefits and find another company that paid more and possibly offered virtual work at home days as well. I could put SD on my passes if we did marry-or she could use friend passes. But then WE would decide WHEN and IF SD will visit us. BM won't be able to just book her on my passes-WE have to agree what works for us, no more bs, his parents can do whatever the heck they want to do as far as we care.

It would be a fresh start, away from the bullshit, not having to deal w/SD anytime BM wants it, if she visits because it's a coastal city I'm sure she'll be entertained enough to not reak havoc on our family. It's sounding SO tempting-I've started my research already.

If anyone is in the TPA area wants to give advice that would be good.