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Here we go again

over step's picture

Puke just called DH cuz BM has to work this weekend and can't watch the pup as she works out of her house. DH told Puke that he was not ready for pup to come. She flipped out saying it was BS cuz they were supposed to discuss after Thanksgiving. She then proceeded to hang up on DH.

Evidently Puke suggested early today that she come tonight and stay til Sunday. This is cuz she has been without a phone for two whole days and wants a new phone NOW. Well, sorry toots but your phone won't be here til probably the end of the week. That changed her mind.

I told DH that if she wants the new phone bad enough she'll find someone to watch the pup. If she just doesn't come, then she'll have to wait til she does come.

Comments

over step's picture

I agree totally. He has been too vague and made puke/BM feel there was hope. He should have said no from the beginning and told them it was not up for discussion.

mom2futuresuperhero's picture

Amen!

furkidsforme's picture

Why does he keep dangling a "maybe" in front of her about that dog? He needs to say NO. Not today. Not tomorrow. Not ever. Not watching the dog, dog not coming here, period. Final answer.

Is he trying to play "nice guy" so he can pin it all on the evil SM who doesn't want the dog there.... so he can tell SD but of course if HE had a say he'd loooooove to watch the dog. He's just *so sorry*.

Cadence's picture

He can't say the word "no" to his child? That's truly ridiculous. Who is the parent and who is the child?

over step's picture

I know this. DH knows this. Still he can't say no forever. I am just keeping my mouth shut as much as possible and letting him deal with it.

notsobad's picture

I have to say I think he's as manipulating as she is.

He won't say No outright because it's a way to keep her on the line. Just like she keeps him on the line by promising to visit but then backing out at the last moment.

This is how they communicate and deal with each other. You are so smart to just stay completely out of it. As long as he doesn't let the dog come, who cares how long he lets her think that some day he might allow it.

Cadence's picture

He better get that strong language going. Softening it just ensures it never stops.

"No" is a complete sentence.

"No."
"But Daaaaaaad, why not?"
"No."
"What? WHYyyyyy?"
"NO. END OF DISCUSSION."

All this "not now" stuff means it never stops.

over step's picture

I have suggested exactly this but he never does. I don't feel completely sorry for him as he's allowed it.

robin333's picture

Good grief, that's a Grade A hissy fit right there. Here's my evil suggestion: that dog isn't getting the vaccinations it needs and I would bet that it isn't properly cared for. So, I would arrange for a friend to assist in rescuing the dog. Let Puke bring the pup, friend comes over and gets the poor thing when all of you are out. Then friend takes to a good home (which you have already arranged ). Make it look like the pup got out somehow, shovel some dirt from under the fence. No one needs to know, no more excuses for Puke. Of course, only do if you are sure she will find another excuse to not visit.

over step's picture

I'm sure she'll still come without the pup. She wants the new phone. Then she'll come around Christmas without pup to get presents. After that she won't have any reason to come so the pup will become an issue again. If not the pup, then she'll fake being sick like she normally does.

robin333's picture

That's right, the phone then presents. I bet you are looking forward to January. Does your DH see the pattern of her visits only happen when she's getting something?

over step's picture

He knew she was only going to come early this time to get the phone. I think he knows that there are times she only comes when it benefits her. He just won't admit it.

lintini's picture

I am so proud of you for holding your ground about the pup. I know I would be in your shoes right now if my DH let the door open to SS bringing over the stray male dog his mom brought home. I still can't believe she tried to get us to watch it when she went to India to find herself when her mom and step dad live around the block from her.

It's sick that SD and BM are using it as some bargaining chip to see how far they can push you guys to see SD. BM probably is filling her head with bs that dad doesn't REALLY want to see her and that the dog should be no big deal in comparison to darling princess daughter. I hate to think that SD will use this "learning tool" in the distant future with her own child to some degree.