Oh shit, that's nothing lol!

I use to steal money from my moms purse. Just enough so she won't know. Shhhhhhhh, don't tell her. I don't want to get grounded.

I was dumb enough to lie to a police officer as to the whereabouts of my ex (we were still together at the time). Well, dummy didn't hide very well and I got carted off to jail for obstruction of justice..a big fat felony here! I got off lucky with court supervision..and now, I don't even friggin jaywalk..I still kick myself in the arse for that one!

I used to be friends with a guy I'll call Tom. I mean really close but not sexual. Tom started getting into drugs and stealing from people, even me. He stole $200 while i was using his bathroom and swore on his mom's life he didn't. Sooooo.... The next day I stole his chihuahua from his yard and sold it to a friend a few towns over for $200!!!
This was before Facebook and such. F you Tom!

Most of you already know this story, but when H and I were first together he failed to get rid of nudie pics of BM. I came across them in a special little box. He didn't know I had found them.
One day she really pissed me off with her CS threats or something, so I took the pics down to the industrial area where the truckers pick up loads and stop over and tossed them about all over the place. Her phone number may have been on one or two of them }:)

My cat gets more kisses from me than my husband does.

I thought about sending a bag of dicks to BM (but I didn't as I decided that was mean spirited. Sometimes, I hate my conscience).

DH is traveling so the skids are with BM and tonight is BSs night with ExH. I will be eating popcorn, m&ms and wine for dinner. I may make a steak as I've had a migraine all day and that helps. I will also burp and fart any time I choose and let at least one cat sleep with me.

I killed BM and buried her in the woods.

At 14 carried a bottle of Chloroseptic throat spray filled with vodka dyed red to school and used it in class.

For my sophomore year of high school I took one hit acid each Monday morning, two on Tuesday, three on Wednesday, four on Thursday, and five on Friday. Would stop tripping about after dinner, sleep, then get up and go again. You build a tolerance, so this plan worked well.

In high school had a guys jaw broken for selling me bad drugs.

Slept with my best friends boyfriend for about a year. Still have no idea why, I didn't even like him much.

Senior year did a partner swap with same best friend for a night. Her BF sucked.

Used to sneak out and steal my BFF's Moms Jaguar convertible and ride around all night. Never got caught and she never noticed the mileage or fuel change.

I still toss my SS's room on occassion when he and DH aren't here just to see what the creepy little fucker is up to.

:jawdrop: :jawdrop: :jawdrop: :jawdrop:

Fuck me, you lot are scary!~!

Sally, I really AM an angel.

I got nothing LOL I wagged school a lot, that's about it!

I might have stolen my mothers cigarettes when I was 12. Might, maybe, could have. My longest standing friend and I may also have sipped various bottles of alcohol from her parents bar when we were 13.

Hmmm...well, recently (last year), I took all the cat poop I could scoop up from a place in our yard and threw it on the neighbor's doorstep (they let their cats run loose despite numerous complaints from neighbors and "talkings to" from the management).

I beat the neighbor lady until her head was bloody. In my defense, it was on my front step and she hit me twice first!

I also poured a whole bottle of Liquid Ass in the blower of her vehicle during winter. I figured it would freeze until spring and then she'd have no idea what caused it. She got rid of that car this spring. I wonder why?

Oh, we had sewer issues over the winter and ended up with raw sewage all over a bundle of firewood we never got around to burning. Well, my wonderful, kind DH was nice enough to give the firewood to the neighbors the last time they were out partying and having a bonfire way too close to their trailer and old wooden fence. }:) He wore work gloves to carry it over there. You could still see dried up pieces of toilet paper on it if you looked. They didn't. I bet it burned wonderfully!

Just wait until the place sells. Then we will REALLY get creative on their partying-every-single-night-loud-as-hell-right-by-our-bedroom-window loser asses!! }:) }:) }:) Get JOBS you 50 year old mooches!

I confess...I found some nudies of BM on an adult website..they were set to private so I made them public and then sent a friend request to everyone on the site I could find from our town so they could see them. They weren't the classy hot kind of nudies either. They were the raunchy kind of pics. I still giggle when I think about it. DH has no idea I did it. BM really needs to be more creative with her passwords!!

Wow! You guys have given me some great ideas! }:)