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Visit with SD

NotYourAverageStepMama's picture

So the countdown to our move is officially very real. In 3 days the packers/movers come to pack and pick up all of our stuff and then at 5 am on Saturday we are out the door and headed to the west coast. We saw SD for a couple of hours Friday which was really nice to see her, but was a bit sad that SD kept thinking we were going “home” aka to our home, so we had to tell her that this time we only got her for a few hours to take her to the park, dinner and the ice cream stand, but next time we saw her it would be longer. DH and I just did not think it was for the best to bring SD to our home and have her see our place in the stages of packing especially with her room not as it usually is, so luckily we had nice weather although very windy to stay outside. It was a miracle that SD was in NEW shoes that actually FIT, was a total first for that. Of course her pants were 2 sizes too small that she could seriously barely pull them up after using the bathroom. At the end of the day, SD did not complain about them, they weren’t cutting off circulation, etc. so it is what it is at least she had proper shoes on.

SD is turning 5 in July and now she is officially in the age group of remembering things so now DH and I officially watch what we say around SD. Not that we ever say or do anything that would get us in trouble with the court or BM or anything, but if there are things we don’t want said to BM, etc. we know to not discuss it in front of her. Nothing SD is remembering is bad either and it is all things she would legit remember, not anything her head is being filled with too so that is good at least. We had a box in my car to drop off to our friends that live near BM after we dropped SD off and SD asked about the box and we told her “oh we are dropping it off to x and x.” Then SD goes “I remember them, we went to their house and they had the dogs, etc.” Meanwhile, she had only been there 2 times and a year ago now so that was impressive.

I feel bad because I know SD is slightly behind the curve for her age, not in a devasting way, but when she goes to kindergarten, in the beginning at least she might struggle to keep up a bit. SD is smart, but because the divorce/custody battle was going on from when she 1.5 until she was 3.5, added in with the several different custody schedules, the constant behavior issues of her sister, etc. SD wasn’t taught as much as she should have during those years. DH and I did try and we tried harder when we had just SD so we were able to give that the attention it needed, plus we had her in daycare/preschool on our time, but when it isn’t happening on the other end it makes it difficult to make those strides with her. At least we will have SD in the summer for a few weeks so we can maybe make some more headway then before she goes off to school.