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BM is complaining ...so here comes guilty daddy

newmom01's picture

I guess Im still ok then with my new issue, .....due to dh and i work scheduale we have been getting sk's on saturday mornings and taking them back sunday afternoon ....WELL... BM is complaining again telling dh to start getting them on thursday or friday, well thursday is out of the question dh works overnight, so that means I would have to answer "wheres my dad?" or "when is dad coming home" questions all night!

My kids are on a great scheduale and are both sleep by 8:30pm. so that i can relax after a long full time day at work and picking my kids up from daycare fixing bottles and changing diapers...I have NO time to entertain you while you constantly say your bored!

Oh well...it was nice while it lasted ...stupid guilty daddy crap!

Last time something like this happened the little ss called his grandpa while I was sleep and so was my other ss.....next thing I know Im awakened by my ringing doorbell LATE AT NIGHT.....his little butt got out of bed and called him to come and pick him up and told him that he was all alone and up by himself!!! I was pregnant at the time and very tired before I went to bed everyone was in bed asleep (at least it seemed) my dh was not there he was at work.

Another time dh was not at home I awoke to my ss's downstairs saying "Im gonna kill you" and they both had gotten REAL knives out of the kitchen drawer. and was waving them around at each other .....they were 7 and 8 at the time

i dont want to be responsible for them if something happens, I worka full time job and have 2 of me and dh's kids and they are under 2! Im tired ...when I go to sleep I go to sleep! I told dh that I would try it one time, but if they pull some stupid stuff again like before, Im NOT watching them

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newmom01's picture

but they have not been bad like they use to be ...they have started kissing me when they come over and when they leave, Im thinking it is because I spend time with them .....I found out recently that bm is hardly around she always has the kids at her parents house or at home with thier step dad .....

I wonder is this there way of lookin at me as thier mom figure?

bm is still around, she still sees them daily (I think) she has full custody, we just have weekend visits....Im thinkin step dad and parents are complaining, so she is putting more pressure on dh

Jsmom's picture

If your DH is not there, then neither should your step kids. Sorry, it is not your responsibility to take care of them. It is your DH's.

ctnmom's picture

I agree w/Jsmom-unless DH wants to change his schedule, sorry, but no. You have your hands full as it is! I guess BM gets to break up her little demons' sword fights herself! }:)

hopefulSM's picture

I have DD12, DD8, DD1, DD7months and then SD10. SD doesn't even want to be at our house if me and the other girls are not home. I don't care. She has visitation time with DH. If DH left me tomorrow - I would have no rights to have SD or see her. What would DH do with SD if you weren't around and he had to work overnight? Pretty sure she would be with her MOM. BM just wants a break and a free night off and doesn't want to have to worry about arranging or paying for anything. Hence, you are now good enough. I have played that game for to many years myself. I finally put my foot down. If DH isn't here and it's not his CO time, I'm NOT an option. If it's DH CO time and he has stuff he has to do - then I will let SD be home with me without him there, but NOT if it's BM's time. I'm not BM's free babysitter. She has her one and only kid that is 10 years old. I have 4 of my own - two under the age of 2. She is not the one that needs a break and I am certainly not the one that needs to give her a break at my own expense.

I have DD12 and DD8 from a previous relationship and honestly, if there BD was not going to be home EVERY SINGLE night on a particular night, I would NOT want them there and would NEVER insiste on them being there. In fact there are times on his scheduled weekend that he has to work and he tells me and we rearrange our schedule so they stay with me (not his GF) and gets them when he doesn't have to work.

Sorry, but your being used by BM and DH is letting you be.