Opinions....Am I Too Hard?
Since SD20 threw her fit after we caught her stealing in January and she filled my phone with her hate texts and bullshit, I blocked her, BM, BM's BF, and SD's husband from my phone, my husband's and my daughters. This is my plan and I pay the bill for all 3 phones. I want no more texts or calls from any of them and I will not remeove the block. They cannot call or text. DH has never asked me to remove his block for he contacts the bitch on his work phone.
SS18 lives with us..he has another year of high school left and will graduate when he's almost 20. He lost his job after missing too many days and then faking a work excuse to get his job back. He has not paid car insurance in months and begs his father for gas money. He has plans of staying with Mommy over the summer because she won't make him work. He has no phone so he has to rely on his dad's work phone to contact his mom and sister so if his dad's not home he can't call them due to my daughter and I having them all blocked.
DH will be gone for the rest of the week out of state and SS came home last night 'excited' that he can do summer school work due to flunking out of some things in the 9th grade. All to the tune of $400 that I'm sure his dad will have to pay due to Mommy not paying a dime ever for her grown adult high school student. He wanted to call his freak ass sister and mother but could not on my phone due to the block. He was upset and said that he felt he was being punished for how his sister had become..and that he felt it was over and didn't know why I'm so angry about it. I told him to get away from me before HE made me angry.
DH has no idea SS intends on hitting him up for $400 for summer school..I'll let him tell him. He still has yet to pass graduation tests - 4 of them in order to graduate and he's taken them 5 times. What a dummy. Why should I feel bad he can't call his mother or sister? For one thing, he HAD a phone plan..he can't get on mine for I can only get 3 lines. He didn't pay the bill and now owes over $500. He had a prepay - and since he's not working, he can't put minutes on it.
Is this my fault? Hell no!
I swear..my SKs are both retarded. My SD for being a total asshole and my SS for being a total dummy. Mommy kept him behind 2 years and I tell you what..he can barely spell.
Yet this kid is going to go to college....yea right.
Am I being too hard? Thoughts? In my mind, nothing constitutes an emergency when it comes to my SD and her mother...NOTHING. So therefore, phones will not be unblocked by me.
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Comments
I don't think you are too
I don't think you are too hard. If he was 5 years old, then maybe it would be harsh not letting him call mommy from your phone...but he is 18. Let him get off his arse and get a job if he wants to use a phone!
Definitely not! Those brats
Definitely not! Those brats need some tough love to aid them in growing up!
Thank you ladies! I have no
Thank you ladies!
I have no thought to unblocking her and I won't be guilted into doing it by SS. His sister is horrible and I don't care to hear her voice on my phone for any reason. His thoughts are that she has a son and if there's any emergency and his dad is gone, she should be able to call me instead - that way I can notify her brother.
Honestly I could care less. And there is where I was feeling horrible for a while..if anything does happen to that little boy I am the only way she could contact her brother is my DH is gone. That's true.
But then again...not my problem. If she had been respectful and not stolen..then went all psychotic on me..she'd have access to call.
She made her bed...just sad SS is somewhat having to pay for her bullshit. Too bad..so sad you know?
The car insurance deal is the
The car insurance deal is the main reason I'm writing this blog..my DH pays if for him. He told him in the beginning if he wasn't the one paying it, his car would sit and not move. SS has not paid it probably since December. Yet still drives. My DH allows him to drive and his insurance is NOT cheap. He's already gotten a speeding ticket too.
DH is allowing his son to be made to feel like a victim over this phone deal....but not to me or my face. He won't step up and tell his son to get over the fact his sister is blocked...deal with it.
Problem with all this is that my SS is actually a good kid..underneath all the crap with his sister and mother...he and I can actually sit and talk about his life and such. We have had our moments - don't get me wrong. I've seen a lot of childishness out of him at various times that irritates me so much - but can talk to him any day over his sister. He just gets around his mother and sister and does such stupid things...yet it's gonna keep happening because he thinks they are both made of gold. So I foresee his and my relationship being very cold over time just like it is now. I don't care for his sister or mother and I don't hide it.
His mother talked him into - and wrote - the fake excuse for his job which made him lose the job. I tried to talk my SS out of it..and thought I had..yet he chose his mother's path. I think it will always be this way.
Plus I watch my DH coddle him at times too...I think if he actually had a chance...he would be such a good kid.
Sad..very sad.
Edited to add: SS just came in and told me that DH owed him $10..I asked for what. He said for doing the laundry...HIS OWN. He never does it and DH will wash, dry, fold, and put away his son's clothes. So now my DH pays his 18yo son to do his own laundry. Amazing. See what I mean? Crippling this used-to-be-boy-now-a-man. Truly amazing.
You are not being too hard.
You are not being too hard. There are plenty of other phones in the world he can use.
If his mother thought it important that he keep in phone contact with her, she would have made arrangements. His sister can pay for his phone if she feels it's necessary.
It's his own fault he doesn't
It's his own fault he doesn't have a phone. Let him use his friend's phones and owe them. Let momma buy him a phone.
He's shown you, or his dad, no respect nor responsibility. Since he's careless, he's not allowed with your things. Makes clear sense to me.
Small wonder he can't pass the test if he doesn't understand where you're coming from.