I told SO that it might be a good idea to get the skids a new therapist, he agreed to that, but when I asked him about taking the tough approach with his kids, he got pretty defensive, saying that last time we did that, he didn't get to see them for nearly a month, and he's not doing that again. Okay that  part I can understand, the kids have every right to see their dad, but they don't get to control our lives. He's becoming very defensive about them a lot lately. I don't he sees them as manipulating him. To him  there these innocent little angels.