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BM's and Mother's Day

MotherTrucker's picture

Since DH FINALLY decided to grow some balls and actually tell SD that he will have to be at work Friday night while she is there, and she still wants to come, I have decided to take all 3 of the girls to Hot Pots. It is a place where you can pick your own pottery, ETC and hand paint them. They fire them for you and you pick it up and TAH DAH! Well, I know that I want the girls to go ahead and make DH something for Father's Day and his Birthday because they are close together, but should I let SD make something for BM for Mother's Day? I was thinking about letting the girls paint something for my mom (nana) and DH's mom (Grandma XYZ) for Mother's Day, so I am sure that SD will ask to make her mom something as well. Maybe something cheap? If this would have been 4 months ago, I would have let SD make something spectacular for BM, but the Hell that BM has put my family through lately makes me want to punch her in her fat face, not pay for a Mother's Day gift. I just don't want to upset SD by telling her "NO, you can't make your mom something for Mother's Day, but here make something for my mom". What do you guys think??


PeanutandSons's picture

Make two trips..... Just make fathers day presents on Friday with the girls. Take only your kids back a different day to make mothers day presents.

MotherTrucker's picture

My mother sees SD as one of her grandkids too though and I would feel bad leaving her out and I would be questioned on it. Not worth the hassell of telling everyone that yes, sometimes she is a devil child and I didn't WANT her to join in. Know what I mean?? Besides, dragging my 3 year old and my 20 month old to Hot Pots twice in one year is way over achieving for me. They can be little turds in public, especially if I have them alone and going to a place where things can be broken easily... not a good idea!

Anon2009's picture

As much he11 as bm has brought to my life I'd suck it up and let her make something. My SDs often make bm things and while she has been nothing but a pain, she's their mom. Depending on SDs age maybe dh could encourage her to save her money to buy bm something small but nice.

Just J's picture

What Peanutandsons said. You're under no obligation to fund a Mother's Day gift for your SD, especially when she's been a bitch. I never asked my step kids if they wanted to pick out gifts for their mom. That is what their Grammy (BM's mom) or their stepdad is for. Make this trip about Father's Day or something for themselves and deal with Mother's Day another time without SD.

step off already's picture

I'm torn on this. As your interaction with SD will help teach her something about you and about life.

However, i can FULLY relate to having a BM that you despise for all of the hell she puts you through.

MotherTrucker's picture

I think I will let he do something for her mom if she asks. I am a firm believer in being the bigger person, even if I don't always come accross that way here on ST, but I am. Maybe it will get under BM's skin even more if she knows that SD went with ME to get and make the gift and we used HER holiday as a bonding time! LOL Oooppss there I go again sounding all mean and what not....