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MOMMYOFTWO's picture

Ok so this afternoon BM calls DH to try and tell him that she is moving back here. Now she has been saying this for over a year now. She claims that her BF bought a house here. She lives in a different state right now. She was trying to tell DH that she was going to enroll SD in school where she was living but could not tell him what school it would be. He told her that they could discuss this when and if she was actually moved here.

Then she started yelling and screaming that she did not want MOMMYOFTWO getting her ready for school and taking her every morning like last year. My DH said "MOMMYOFTWO does a fabulous job of getting SD ready and to school every morning. You chose not to be involved with SD's school stuff last year and you have no one to thank but yourself for missing that" Then it came out that BM was mad because SD wants me to take her to school and get her ready everyday just like last year.

Um excuse me lazy moron BM but YOU were the one who up and moved to another state and YOU were the one who decided to only take EOW visitation instead of 50/50 and YOU were the one who did not bother to show up to ANYTHING at school even though I told you about EVERYTHING that went on! This crap just really ticks me off! She went to 2 things the ENTIRE year last year and then wants to try and somehow blame it on me! I guess I have more power than I thought! And come to find out she was here in town at least once a week the whole year yet she NEVER bothered to come spend extra time with SD.

SD was so embarrassed by her that she would not even tell people at school who she was. She told one teacher that BM was "A friend of my moms (ME)." I guess really I should not get worked up about this whole thing because even if by some miracle she does move back it wont matter anyways because DH is the CP during school so SD goes to school where we live anyways. BM is ALL TALK! She likes to run her mouth about how she should be in control and this is how its going to be but she doesn't follow through with anything. It is too much work for her to actually take care of her kid but she wouldn't want anyone to think that she doesn't. It just really irritates me to deal with lazy trashy drama queens who have nothing better to do than run their mouth about stupid stuff so they won't "feel" like the piece of sh** parent that they really are. I really think she needs a life!

Sorry for the long vent! I feel much better now!


StepG's picture

I just do not understand how these BM's cannot appreciate that there is another person that loves their child and wants what's best for their child? You were good enough all last year to take SD to school and now it is a problem. I think the BM's act this way because they feel guilty in their hearts and their concious is eating at them for not being the Mom they should be to their children. they are so selfish that they do not want to do what is right for their kid in the first place and then selfish again to not want anyone else do it either. We talk about selfish kids sometimes what about selfish parents? If you know she is all talk then you are right to let it roll of your back. Let her blow her smoke and feel all in charge and then you continue to take SD to school and be a great role model for her.

now4teens's picture

She's angry at her own bad and pitiful parenting and is taking it out on the ONLY person she can- YOU.

I get the same thing here. And although it does want to make me throttle the BM by the neck, over the years, I have come look at those comments in a different light...

She is completely miserable. She knows she is a F'up in the motherhood department and she knows that her children are happy and content and proud that I have come into their lives to fill that void. And it eats her up EVERY DAY. Because it was only by her OWN BAD CHOICES that it is this way and continues to be. She is not doing anything to change her own bad behavior and make herself a better mother to her girls, but she only wants to cut me down.

So whenever she makes those ridiculous comments, I continue to hold my head up high, do the right thing for the girls, and wear those comments like a badge of honor. There's no way I'm going to let HER get the best of me for doing the right thing for her daughters Smile

Just a thought!

"If you have never been hated by a child, you have never been a parent."
-Bette Davis

MOMMYOFTWO's picture

I love the comment "wear those comments like a badge of honor"! I usually don't let stuff like this get to me but it seems like about every 6 months or so I just get fed up. BM never knows and never will know that she gets to me at all but never the less I do get irritated now and then about it! I love that advise though and I think that is exactly what I will do! THanks!


Elizabeth's picture

BM moved an hour away (not out of state) when SD was 11 and left her with us for four years. Even though she was informed of every activity, she just never could make it. But she could make it back to our town to shop and visit her friends, during which time she did not try to get in contact with SD. I just don't get it! (But SD idolizes BM and now wants to live with her.)

MOMMYOFTWO's picture

Yep these women are so ridiculous! My SD "tolerates" BM. She loves her because she has to but SD and I have a much deeper and better relationship than SD and BM. SD is a VERY smart little girl and started seeing through BM's bull at about 5 years old. I made sure I NEVER said anything bad about BM and let SD figure it out for herself! She sure did! These BM's are selfish, that's all there is to it!