Is BM back to her old self?
Those of you who are familiar with my inlaw + step family dynamics will most likely follow my theory here the easiest.
Basically, my MIL acts as gatekeeper with skid’s visitation. Both she and FIL steamroll DH when it comes to communication with BM. In turn, BM sidesteps and flat-out ignores all communication with DH, when she can 100% get her needs met through his parent’s tolerance of her BS.
BM hates accountability and rules.
With all that said, I’m starting to wonder if this sudden opt out of coming for Christmas visitation doesn’t have to do with something I said to MIL a few days prior to DH’s phone call to skid.
What I told MIL is: I was done with her total disregard for allowing and not supporting DH to communicate directly with BM in regards to skid’s visitation.
It would make total sense that BM contacted MIL, and that MIL could have responded with something along the lines of “You need to speak to my son regarding skid’s visitation this Christmas,” and BM was NOT having any of it.
I can totally see her then turning to skid and saying “We think it’s best you stay home this Christmas.” Anyone that knows BM knows she is forever pawning skid off on somebody else. I cannot imagine her wanting to have skid around most of December, opposed to being away for 3.5+ weeks. Rather, this is a consequence to someone holding her accountable to the CO.
BM’s solution? Simple. To not allow skid to visit. A sort of THREE birds, one stone dealio. Not only can she “punish” DH with trying to have a backbone, but his parents too.
This was always BM’s MO back in the day. If you were saying something she didn’t want to hear, she’d literally hang-up on you and go radio silent.
Now, don’t go thinking I give two sh**s about anyone’s feelings here, or that I want skid here for Christmas, it just has got me thinking and reminiscing about the good ‘ol days and BM’s withholding tactics when things didn’t go her way and someone had the backbone to stand up to her.
My spidey senses are feeling something here...