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When To Quit Trying with BM

mndblwn's picture

DH and I are basically primary parents of ss8. BM tries to squeeze the the cracks of the CO any way she can. For her weekends it states that she will pick up ss after school and bring him back to an agreed upon location in our county. Well she says that it doesn't give a specific time after school so she ALWAYS comes at 6pm at night to drive 3.5 hours home with ss. She always tells us if we are there then the law will be violated. We know that pleasing her of this 6pm keeps the police away from our house and hours upon hours of pointless emails to her. However, DH and I do have lives that don't revolve around her and we do have plans sometimes. We gave BM 1.5 month notice about not being able to meet her at this time so she would have to come on time (for once, but we didn't say that) or switch weekends for us to meet at 6pm. This woman spent all day telling us we were stupid, ignorant, non flexible and wanting all the control. She threatened us with court and being in violation of the law. Again no where does it say that the time is 6pm. We are flexible on that because she is truely crazy and will show up at our house or cause a scene with the police. The kids don't need to see that kind of thing.

Very rarely do we come up with situations that we need to switch times or can't keep things mellow. We had our car bust last week and it's the only one we have but she wouldn't bring ss into town for us to get him. Our neighbor had to go out of his way and take us to get ss. This BM is unwilling to work with us on anything UNLESS is benefits her in some way OR when she really wants something from us. It's really hard to plan family things because of my work schedule and ss school schedule. The poor kid travels with his mom 3 weekends a month. Oringinally we were trying to go for every other weekend but she wanted 3 weekends due to him being here with us for school. She (thank god) doesn't live in our town but 240 miles away. SS leaves thursday night to return sunday night. I feel ss misses out on somethings with us and the family because of her.

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