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I am so ready to kill SS, DH and BM

missangie1978's picture

I am so ready to strangle SS and kill both BM and DH

This weekend was BM’s weekend with SS (SS lives with us), well she had things to do on Sunday so sent him home early, fine whatever. Well when SS got home he rushes to his room (I should have known something was up). When he gets out he’s acting funny so I tell him to go get his bag he took to his mom’s so I can get the clothes out and do the laundry. SS brings the bag out and I can tell that he’s taken something out of it, I question him and he says he didn’t.

Well stupid me I just let it go and do the laundry, I tell DH who is in the garage working on something that I’m headed to the gym and that SS is acting strange and is up to something and to keep an eye on him, DH of course tells me that he’s sure SS isn’t up to anything but he’ll keep a look out.

So I get back from the gym, DH is still out in the garage and SS is in his room. I call to the dogs (we’ve got a 6 month German Shepherd and a 1 year old Lab mix), our German Shepherd pup comes running but no sign of Dozer our Lab mix. This is so not like the Dozer that I whistle for him (taxi cab whistle mind you so it is LOUD), still no dog… I ask DH if he’s seen Dozer and he tells me that Dozer was playing army with SS in the backyard earlier so I go out to the backyard to look for Dozer. We’ve got a large backyard with a bunch of trees and scrubs at the top of the yard and sometimes the dogs like to go hide behind there to chew on bones or just to get away from everything so that is where I head.

Well I duck in under some tree limbs and there is my boy looking at me and laying down and he starts whining when he sees me. I know something’s up because he NEVER sits around when someone else is around because he’s always on the move. So I go over and check him out. Well that’s when I see all this dry blood over his chest area and when I touch it he starts whining again. So I pick him up (not easy mind you he’s 70 lbs) and get him into the house and look at his chest again, he’s definitely been bleeding so I scream for DH who comes running and so does SS. I ask what the hell happened and DH of course knows nothing because he was in the garage the whole time and when we question SS he says he doesn’t know. I can tell he’s lying but for now just let it go since we all need to get Dozer to the emergency vet.

We were at the emergency vet for what seemed liked days and Dozer ended up needing surgery and guess what they found? 2 BB pellets in his chest, we have never bought SS a BB gun because I don’t feel he’s mature enough and sometimes has no common sense. Well when we get home I go straight to SS’s room and start tearing through the room. He and DH come in asking what I’m doing, I tell them I’m looking for the BB gun. DH starts telling me I’m crazy that SS doesn’t have one and would never shot the dog that it most of have been one of the neighbor kids shooting it off in their backyard, I look at SS and ask him straight out, “Did you shot Dozer with a BB gun” he swears he didn’t that DH is right it must have been a neighbor kid. Well guess what I find hidden in his pillow case? Yep a BB gun.

Seems BM bought one for SS and told him not to tell us because we wouldn’t allow him to keep it or play with it. I was PISSED. DH tries to say that it had to be an accident that SS would never shot the dog. I honestly know that SS wouldn’t shot the dog thinking he’d kill or really hurt him but the problem is that he KNEW that the dog was hurt and bleeding and instead of tell his dad he ran to hide his gun and then let the dog stay out back crying and bleeding.

I am so PISSED that if DH wasn’t there I would have more than likely smacked SS and honestly DH too for actually siding with SS.

I'm so ready to just take the dogs and get out or better yet kick both DH and SS out (the house is under my name)


Chel Bell's picture

your poor dog!!! That , to me , is the same as shooting an innocent child!! And BM bought it for him, and incoraged him to lie about it, and hide it. Way to go mom!! I guess he can now keep it at her house, and shoot some thing she loves dearly...and get away with it. Sorry, that just pisses me off! "~waiting on the world to change~"

Endora's picture

I would have LOST it! That is sooo painful for the dog-unbelievable!

One and One make two in my book-I think the fact that SS was in possession of a BB gun puts him in the hot seat.

I would NOT allow him to have a BB gun (he can have it at his Mom's)in the house-and he can volunteer at an animal shelter for a consequence if he is old enough!

I hope Dozer is ok now....

Step Parenting – you might need to step back before you step in something!

melis070179's picture

Wow, what an a$$hole...both of them! What did you guys do with the BB gun? Did you punish SS? Poor doggy, that is so sad. And he shot him twice?! Two bullets, right? I'd break that gun in half & take away every luxury he has for a month, and not allow him anywhere near the dogs!

Dawn-Moderator's picture

My head is just spinning about your whole story!!! That is so awful and shocking!!! I can't even tell you right now, what I would do!!! I just can't imagine that Bm encouraged him to smuggle a BB gun into your house. That has to violate something!!

Your Dh should be all over this!! He can't stick up for ss with this one. It's very serious.

You were definitely right. Your ss isn't mature or responsible enough to have a BB gun. You can now throw in untrustworthy!!!!

I hope your puppy is going to be ok!!!!!


bewitched's picture

"To Thine Own Self Be True" William Shakesphere

I, like you, am an animal lover. This is too much. What kind of little monster would do such a thing, and just leave the animal to suffer? Had it with these men and their spoiled rotten kids who are never held accountable for anything!

My SD17 claims to love my golden retreiver Max so very much, that I've actually left him in her care when we've gone out of town. No more. Seems as tho she was letting one of her friends 4 yr old ride him like a horse. He's a large dog, suffers occasional hip problems-which she is well aware of. Last time she was her, I caught her feeding him jalepenos-and laughing at the look on his face when it burned. She's not going to have him with her ever again.

bellacita's picture

if someone did that to my baby, trust me, there would be hell to pay. that poor dog!!!!!

i hope DH called BM and laid into her about buying him one in the first place, letting him bring it into ur house against ur wishes...GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!! i am so mad!!!!

is the doggie okay? give him hugs from all of us.

"Given the right reasons and the right two people, marriage is a wonderful way of experiencing your life."
~the late great George Carlin

Chel Bell's picture

But make BM pay the vet bill!! As because of her thoughtlessness, this would not have happened."~waiting on the world to change~"

missangie1978's picture

I left the house early this morning because I can't stand to look at SS or DH I just want to strangle both of them.

I did however call BM and ripped her head off for sending SS to our house with a BB gun and tellimg him to lie to us about it. She called DH's cell rigth after hanging up with me. I answered that as well. She was pretty pissed when I answered DH's cell and started in on her again as well as the fact that I threw away a very expensive BB gun (I will toss anything I want if it is in my house)

I've taken SS's BB gun and it's been thrown out - I took it to work adn threw it out so SS wouldn't try to dig in out of the garbage at home. I've also grounded him from Halloween this year and he's grounded from EVERYTHING for a month. DH thinks SS should be allowed to go trick-or-treating but that's not going to happen I've already tossed SS's costume.

I've also told DH that SS is required to go to counseling and that if SS does anything else to the dogs, any of them that he's out (it's my house I decide who gets to live there)

Chel Bell's picture

I think counseling for SS is a good idea...I'm no C.S.I., but how do you accidently shoot a dog??"~waiting on the world to change~"

Elizabeth's picture

But my dad once shot me in the foot accidentally with a BB gun when he was trying to shoot my cat and I tried to stop him. But I don't think it's possible to shoot a dog twice in the same place unless you were restraining them and trying to hurt them. Good job throwing away the gun and grounding him. My husband refuses to believe SD does anything unless he has 100 percent proof (as in someone saw her). He has pulled this before and refused to let me punish her.

For example, my cat is 100 percent indoors (never goes outside). But one day not long after SD had a friend over, cat turned up with three puncture wounds to her rump (near her tail). There is NOTHING in our house that could injure her that way, and for her to run into it three times is impossible. We never figured out how it happened, but I'm SURE it was SD who was responsible.

Your poor puppy!

now4teens's picture

Good God, MissAngie, I am so sorry for you and your poor defenseless dog.

This is wrong, and I'd be pissed off, on SO many levels:

*the BM encouraged SS to sneak this dangerous "toy" into your home, and telling him to lie to both his father and you...WRONG!

*SS shoots a defensless animal. This is a RED FLAG and a sign of a serious emotional problem. Shoot empty soda cans or little plastic "army men", but YOUR PRECIOUS PET???? and then LIE about it when confronted...WRONG!

*your A$$hole DH refused to admit that his precious little 'angel' had anything to do with it AT ALL...even when confronted with the CLEAR EVIDENCE to the contrary. Are you kidding me?????

Oh my goodness, MissAngie, I don't know what I'd do if I were in your shoes right now, but I'd seriously be thinking of kicking their butts to the curcb over this one!

Give that sweet little dog of yours a big hug from me Smile

"If you have never been hated by a child, you have never been a parent."
-Bette Davis

sarahbernheart's picture

I love my dogs and I would have done the same thing to my SS and I would be LIVID with my FH if he did NOTHING< omg I would shoot both of them ok maybe not but I would think about it!!
"Better a diamond with a flaw than a pebble without one."

doglover1's picture

I just read your post and i am not shocked. I had a similar situation with my SD8. She was throwing rocks at my dogs. I have 3. 2 goldens and a jack russel. Well I flipped! This was months ago, since then everything has been fine. You seem to be handling the problem. Stick to your guns (no pun intended) and make sure ss gets counseling and DH needs to get his head out of the forest so he can see the trees!! Hope your pup is ok!!

Lulu's picture

Wait! Wait! Wait! How old is SS? If he is under 9 or so, he may have just not known that a BB Gun could actually hurt you. I agree he should have told dad that the dog was hurt but maybe he was really scared. My cousin shot my other cousin in between the eyes once. The BB Lodge itself in his forehead. He was probably 9 or 8. They were both scared to death to tell my mom. They just didnt realize the harm it could have caused. As for the BM, she should get a reaming. If it was known that a BB gun would not have been allowed at your house, she should have kept it at hers. Encouraging a child to lie is the worst possible thing in the world to do. What she is teaching him will cause him more misery in his life to come than anything else. Your anger should teach the SS that what he did was really serious and should not be taken lightly.

lil_teapot's picture

Not only is your poor fur-baby hurt, but the H is protecting SS and 'betraying' you. He's supposed to be on your side, and the two of you ar supposed to be a united front. But for him to not be on your side is a betrayal or whatever you want to call hurts and it shows SS that the two of you can be divided, and he can do the dividing. H is giving SS power over both your lives, and even the lives of your animals...and it's one thing for a parent to let their kid walk on them, but for that parent to allow their kid to walk on the step parent and innocent, defenseless animals...that's just sooo wrong!
H owes you a huge, giant apology and most importantly, actions! He needs to stand up and grow a pair and put his kid in his doesn't matter how old he is, wrong is wrong!
It sounds like the whole family should have some counseling to address these issues because H isn't showing you respect or good parenting, and SS needs to be held accountable fully for what he's done. And I agree that BM should be held accountable for her part. She sounds like a complete b!!!! She is responsible for her kid's actions...had she not bought the gun and allowed him to have it, AND encourage him to sneak it into your home, your doggie wouldn't have been injured. I think you definitely should force this issue and even if you have to go to court, make BM pay the vet bills. It's definitely not about money, it's about putting BM in her place and showing her that she does not control your home, and she is responsible for her actions and those of her child.
I really hope Dozer is going to be ok. Hugs to you and hope he has a speedy recovery.

brutallyhonest's picture

I don't know how old your SS is, but he if he knew enough to hide the gun, he is old enough to know what he was doing was wrong. Kids don't hide things they think are ok to have. Secrets and hiding are not good, especially when a kid can play it against 2 families. Plus the lying and hiding when you've hurt someone/thing, even on accident, is wrong. You have a moral duty to get the thing you hurt help!

Your DH should have your back on this. What will happen when you find pot in the kid's room in a few years? Will he defend the kid then? I can't believe the BM, saying it is ok to hide ANYTHING in YOUR house.

Stick to your guns on counseling. For DH too. He shouldn't undermine you in front of ss. I think SS should have to work off the vet bill as well. And don't let him get out of it by deciding not to come for his EOW or whatever you have set up (that is what my SD did when she had to work off something she broke- just stopped coming over so she could avoid the punishment)

Hope your dog is ok. I would be furious too!

Most Evil's picture

I am tempted to say, I don't want that kid in my house. He could have killed a defenseless animal!!! as I am sure you know. Isn't cruelty to animals a sign of a serial killer? Is there any way to have the cops come calling on your SS next time he is there. He needs to have the crap scared out of him or smacked out of him if anyone will - his life would be miserable if we could get a hold of him!! I really think you should press charges, on what I don't know but maybe there is something.-!

"A lie told often enough becomes the truth." - Vladimir Lenin

frustratedinMA's picture

I would have broke that gun into a million pieces in front of him... I would have taken a hammer to the sucker and shown the kid what I really thought of the toy.

I think missing Halloween will be good for him. He is old enough to know better, there are no excuses. Too bad for DH if he doesnt like it. That is just INEXCUSABLE.. and this lesson will teach him to NOT hide crap from you two, and that LYING is NOT acceptable in your home. I am sure if he had told your dh that the dog was hurt, and NOT lied when directly asked you would NOT have grounded him for as long as you did.

I think you made the right choices.

bewitched's picture

"To Thine Own Self Be True" William Shakesphere
your stepson probably knew the damage he could do, regardless of what his BM may have said. Kids talk at school, and boys love to brag about shooting things-trust me, I raised two sons.

Even if he didn't realize the severity of the damage, when he shot the poor dog the first time, he would have immediately realized he had hurt it-it would have yelped or whined or ran. So, what really bothers me, is the second BB. Playing army doesn't mean you hurt an animal and then turn around and do the same thing again. 10 is quite old enough-he was perfectly aware of the fact that he injured the dog with the first shot. Then followed it with a second shot. Sorry, I just don't buy the boys story of not knowing he had hurt the dog the first time. Accident? not.

missangie1978's picture

oh don't worry I know that SS is not stupid so I don't care if he did honestly believe what BM told him he is still 100% responisble for his action which is why he's now grounded until Jan (for shoting and jumping on my dog) and he starts weekly counseling as of tonight.

He's pretty much stuck in his room with no toys or anything other than his bed and clothes until Jan. He can come out to go to school, eat, pee, go to counseling and to volunteer and the animal shelter (my mom's taking him on our weekends).

He also knows that if he even "accidentally" hurts any other living thing again that he's screwed, one of the kids at school ended up a boot camp for stealing and keeps saying how horrible and scary it was and we've been telling SS that if he hurts one more living creature that's where he is going. DH thinks it is just a threat I'm totally serious and I usually get my way in the end.