What about Father's Day?
I didn't want to hijack askYOURdad's blog about recognition on Mother's Day but I do have a question about Father's Day.
I don't have any bios. I am that woman who puts up with the "father" part of my DH because the man himself is just so wonderful and (so far) he's just worth the extra hassle that comes with him from his past life.
Should I acknowledge him on FD?
I came into the picture two years ago. The first year, I made other plans for the weekend so he could be alone with his kids. Last year, I stuck around but I noticed they didn't do anything for him. I didn't do anything either. I suppose in an intact family it's always the other parent showing appreciation on MD/FD but last year all he got from BM was complaints that she thought they should be in church. Nice. I'm actually glad they don't pat each other on the back on those holidays and help the kids make or buy gifts for each other. So am I supposed to do that now?
Here's my dilemma: I spend as little time as possible during the rest of the year acknowledging the "father" part of him. He does everything (cooking, cleaning, shopping, etc) when the kids are at our house because he's the dad...I'm not the mom...it's his job. I have never had to officially disengage because I never was engaged to begin with. I tolerate his kids and somewhat patiently wait for them to go home so I can have my husband back. If he posts pics or status updates about his kids on FB I don't "like" or comment.
It would feel all kinds of weird and awkward if I did anything for him on FD but I KNOW no one else is going to acknowledge him. Does anyone have suggestions for things that I can do to show him I support him?
The best I can come up with is to watch Chris Rock that day: "Nobody gives a fuck about Daddy. Think about everything that the real daddy does: pay the bills, buy the food, put a fucking roof over your head. Everything you could ever ask for. Make your world a better, safer place. And what does Daddy get for all his work? The big piece of chicken."