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DH's new weekly schedule...not happy!

Marie09's picture

DH and I are both active people. We dont have to be together 24/7 but do enjoy pretty much everything together. We have the skids EOW and every Thursday. We went from NOT having busy wks to now DH has ONE night, he doesnt have something planned. His schedule:

Sunday - Softball (if we have the skids, I normally watch)
Monday - Another softball league (USE to be date night)
Tuesday - Nothing (but since its his only free night, its now cut the grass night)
Wednesday - Horseshoes (I go with him most wks but sometimes not)
Thursday - Skids (SS8 is in Boy Scouts so I watch SS5)
Friday - EOW with skids
Saturday - SS5 teeball & EOW

Where is the wife time?! I told him that I dont have anytime for me! Because I dont want to do something on Tuesday and that be the only time I see him and I'm not happy that I get stuck with SS5 every Thurs and both on Sunday. I brought to DH attention today that he is overbooked and house duties are lacking. I feel so frustrated that I have nothing for myself and he has all these things. Not to mention, I just miss him and spending time with him on the couch or taking a walk.

Comments

folkmom's picture

so how did he reply? why doe she get two softball leagues and one horsehoe league? that seems unbalanced.

Marie09's picture

He said that he's sorry but that horseshoes in ending in 3 wks. Softball just started last wk and he was originally only on one league and then another one approached him b/c he belongs to a man club where he plays horseshoes at. And the Boy Scout thing just started a month ago. So 6 wks ago, our schedule was not like this. We had Sun-Wed doing nothing and our free wkds. It all just came about in the past 4 wks.

He said nothing would slack on the house and he still wants to do date night. Yeah well I'm not eating dinner at 9pm on Mondays with a sweaty man, it just aint happening!

folkmom's picture

i would say he has to drop one softball league. and no more three activities in the future.

tell him " you only do the sunday league because I babysit your kids, would you be doing it if i did not babysit?"

Kb3Hooah's picture

How long is the softball leagues? They're only for a couple of months right? What does he do when he's not playing softball on these days?

______________________________________
"Most couples have not had hundreds of arguments, they've had the same argument hundreds of times."

Marie09's picture

They both play till Fall. Which I normally go on Sundays and I enjoy watching and sometimes walk the track while I'm there. But like I said our schedule went from free wk days to that. So normally nothing, we were working on our house, painting, cleaning up the backyard. Since this schedule everything has been put on hold. So I said I was going to overtake the painting (I'm a horrible painter) and he keeps saying no he'll finish it.

I get its for a couple of months but this is also summertime and I want to relax and have fun, cant exactly do that with this nightmare of a schedule.

evangeline's picture

what a nightmare, I would go nuts too!! hes off every night having fun whilst you stay at home either alone or looking after his kids? er no. I have sort of the same problem where he is working away EOW and we have skids EOW, so when he is here, they are around and he does kung fu with them every mon and thurs when he is here but then again, the evenings are not mine until they are in bed.

DH doesnt seem to get it - that we need to spend time together to build our relationship, if we dont then we will argue more/lose sight of what we need from each other/wont know each other properly anymore etc etc. Hes of the same opinion as his mother that kids are most important which is total BS. Our relationship is just as important because after they have gone its back to just us again and I dont want to start from scratch.

Marie09's picture

Ugh...DH thankfully realizes that our marriage is important and requires work and time. He has from the beginning. He doesnt put his kids before me or me before them. There is a good balance.

Him and I talked last night and kinda got how we both felt about things. So we'll see how things go.