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Ss8 and injuries...should we worry?

Maria10's picture

In the past 12 weeks SS8 Has been with us 10 weekends. Out of the ten weekends 8 of them he was sick or injured.

Weekend1-3 black eye due to falling(2nd black eye in 7 months ). New scrapes and bruises on legs back arms. From school according to BM.

Weekend 5 ( had weekend 4 off) came with 3 staples in his head. Fell off a swing at school on Tuesday( tuesday was the coldest day of the year and school was not in session for ANYONE. The whole week was icy enough to not let kids outside)

Weekends 678 were spent with SS8 coughing and sick.we gave him medicine and sent some home with him. 

Weekend10 (9 was off) sick to stomach, refusing to eat and have his ears cleaned. Upon gently looking in his ear I saw there was scarring.

All of the weekends he gets sent over dirty( sometimes sprayed with cologne/perfume) with stained, illfitting clothes.

All of the weekends he is ready to go to bed by 6pm .Friday and yawning and lethargic.

According to BM all of the injuries happen at school( do I think this is true? NOPE)

We are worried. Should we be or are these things just normal business for being 8yo?

Comments

lieutenant_dad's picture

If you're worried, contact the pediatrician and take him in to make sure he isn't ill. If he is bruised/hurt when he shows up at your place, take pictures and take him to the doctor ASAP. They will likely contact DCS, and your home will also be investigated. However, if you have nothing to hide, then you have nothing to hide.

You can also contact the school about all these school-related injuries, asking why DH hasn't been informed about his kid *constantly* being injured. That may raise alarm bells with them and have them pay attention.

Document, document, document. If you think SS is in immediate danger, contact an attorney tomorrow and get guidance on what you can/should do.

notsurehowtodeal's picture

If those kind of injuries happened at school, there is going to be documentation. DH should contact the school, in person, and find out what happened. If they didn't happen at school, he should contact CPS.

If there is scarring in his ear, SS should be checked out by a pediatrician. DH should look at all of his medical records and see if there is information there about the scarring. A complete physical is probably a good idea since he has been sick so much.

Listen to your gut. If you feel like something is wrong, it probably is.

STaround's picture

Dad needs to immediately contact school and pediatrician.  

justmakingthebest's picture

I agree with Notsurehowtodeal. Call the school. Find out what is going on and if the injuries happened there. Then ask to have his teacher call back. Teachers notice things. They are with them daily and can tell when something is "off". If the teacher says that the injuries happened there and SS is his normal self, I would probably chalk it up to a rough couple of months. They happen... not normally that bad, but not out of the relm of possibilities. 

If the teacher is concerned, next step his his peditrician. Call in advance and let them know your concerns. From there you can decide if this is serious and needs to go to CPS.

Curious Georgetta's picture

Or who at school is doing this to him,?

His father should definitely contact the school to see what is going  on at school.  Had the mother just started sending him in dirty and I ,-fitting clothing? Does this behavior coincide with the start of the injuries?

The dad needs to intervene.

 

 

Chmmy's picture

It's normal for an 8 yr old to get hurt and sick but the stories are inconsistent. Im not sure what the scarring in the ear is but I have inner ear damage due to my neglecting myself when I had no health insurance in my late 20s. I had ear infections that I ignored. My mom finally took me to the doc with a fever of 103 with sinus & ear infections that obviously weren't going away.

Before you accuse abuse or neglect see a doc and contact the school for the real story. The boy may have fallen on a Monday and mom misspoke that it was Tuesday. We all get our days confused at times. Ssometimes I dont know what day it is myself.

Sounds like some documenting and investigating would be your first step. 

SayNoSkidsChitChat's picture

One of my kids gets sick a lot and the other is clumsy. I think maybe Biowh0re is hitting your SS.

Staples in his head? Wtf?

Maria10's picture

He fell and the skin broke open enough that they had to put staples not stitches.

The story was that this time the injury happened at school and was not SS8 fault. Somebody pushed him off a swing when they were playing at school.

The thing is the prior two weeks were the coldest snowiest weeks of the year. The days in question were record lows and ALL schools were closed. I can't fathom a school letting childre play outside in subzero weather(on the swings no less). 

I personally would have not thought about it but as his dad was speaking SS13 informed us he did not have school on the days in question and was surprised SS8 did. 

Maria10's picture

We are suspecting neglect( bm was neglecful when her and dh were together). 

However without proof( from school, pediatrician etc.)f we a re not going to call any authority to report. Confronting BM has not yielded any results in the past.

Another thing that worries me is that the severity and rate of injuries has increased since she put ss8 on her husbands insurance(almost 4 months ago)8.  Makes me suspicious of her trying to hide how often accidents do occur. Prior to that we know the school had sent Ss8(then 7) home several occasions for being inappropriately dressed in small girls clothes( DH overheard a fight while dropping off SS8).

ESMOD's picture

He could be bullied at school.. he might be abused at home.  He might just be super unlucky.. I know that my vision caused me to be less than graceful and my mom always said that they would have been investigated in a different time..lol. 

At 8, he is old enough to have a talk with his dad about all of these things.. that it's important for his dad to know if he needs help.. if someone is bullying him at school etc.. It does sound a bit excessive.

ESMOD's picture

btw.. next time he comes with an injury.. you go to take him to the hospital and tell the med professionals your concerns.. they will be obligated to have sservices involved.

Maria10's picture

I thought about bulying too. Ss8 is nonverbl so telling anyone cannot happen. I ask him to show me where it hurts and he puts my hand on the area. 

He is also rambunctious but listens very well when told no. Some scrapes and bruises are to be expected. Heck we have a big dog(Moose-50 lbs), gives me bruises on the regular bc thinks it's still a puppy.  I would not even care about a scraped knee and whatnot.

Will go to school and ask questions. 

What a poopy choice bullying or abuse or both.

I really hope it's me overreacting and it is something simple such as vision or balance issues.

Won't know unless I go.

amyburemt's picture

pick up the injury reports from the school nurse or have them emailed to him. That will show if this is truly happening at school