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SS's two hour temper tantrum...

LRP75's picture

So, apparently SS has had an attitude all day that seems to stem from the fact that my son is coming to spend the weekend.

My son has not seen the skids really since Christmas, other than for an hour or so when we moved into this house.

My kid and I walk in the door and H says hi to my son, they exchange pleasantries, etc. SS is sitting like a stone on the sofa. H goes out to fire up the grill, and I'm getting ready to take the dog for a quick walk. H intends on going with me and we both invite SS and my son to join us. My kid passes, SS refuses to answer about whether he is going to go or not.

Then, next thing I know, SS is indeed going with us, but instead of walking, he's going to ride his bike. Ok, cool. Except that SS decides that he doesn't really want to be with us and takes off. At one point, as he is turning around in someone's driveway, he hits a car with his bike handle (no damage, not even a scuff). H reminds him that he needs to be careful. SS gets an attitude. I get frustrated, because hey, lose the 'tude. And I said, "it's important to make sure that you aren't anywhere near other people's cars when you are on your bike." SS snaps at me and said, "I KNOW!" I said, "Having an attitude about the situation doesn't make the mistake go away."

All it was, was just a simple mistake. HOWEVER, the kid still needs to be reminded that it is not ok to hit other people's cars with his bike. SS is notorious for not being able to accept responsibility for what he's done AND for being way too "sensitive" when even gently corrected. His ego cannot handle even the smallest of constructive criticisms. He freaks out and sulks for hours.

After this exchange, he decides to take off on his bike. Whatever. H and I just let him go. Then SS decides that, because we didn't chase after him or call after him, he doesn't want to be on the walk with us at all and screams at us that he's, "GOING HOME!"... Uh, ok. Whatever. H and I finish walking the dog.

When we get home, SS is giving everyone the silent treatment. H and I go out in the backyard to grill up some dogs and kielbasa's for dinner and we hear the front door slam twice (as though someone went out and came back in). I peek in the house and SS is giving my son a sh*t ass look and is walking out of the front door again. Hmm.

A few minutes later, I hear voices on the side of the house. I peeked around the corner to find H talking to SS. SS is whining and crying.

What's SS's problem? The fact that H corrected him about hitting the car with his bike AND the fact that my son is also visiting on HIS TIME WITH HIS DAD and then starts throwing a crying fit about how my son didn't visit when SD was here. Seriously.

I let it go on for about two minutes before I called my H into the backyard. When he came over to me, I just quietly reminded him about how SS and SD will throw those tantrums to monopolize his time and attention. That in order for SS to be able to learn to regulate his emotions and to buck up, it's really important for H to not feed into it. Also, if SS is having a problem with the fact that my son is here, he needs to get over it and H needs to not feed into it by paying SS any attention about it.

Then what happens? Ohhhh. SS tells H that he is "leaving and not coming back." H says, "ok." SS stomps off and did indeed leave. I give H a lot of credit, he did NOT run after the kid. Nor did he go to the door to look to see if he could see SS. Nothing. He didn't respond AT ALL. SS ends up dragging this out for two hours. TWO HOURS!!!

We all ignored him. SS was PISSED that he was not getting a response from anyone.

After two hours he finally came home, but when he walked in he looked right past us and won't talk to us. :sick:

Now he's acting like nothing happened.

I'm so glad that H didn't feed into it.

I can't wait for SS to go home tomorrow. This sh*t is beyond old.

Comments

LRP75's picture

My son spends a lot of time with us when the skids aren't here. He hasn't wanted to be around the skids because, well, they are pains in the asses.

So yeah. He was disappointed to see SS act that way.

I honestly don't even care where he went for 2 hours. Under a bridge with a troll is a good place for him.

Now SS is all cuddled up next to H -- there isn't even an inch of space between SS and H.

One more day. One more day. One more day.

BuffaloGal's picture

Sorry LRP. Evidently your DH doesn't see that he's maybe rewarding the kid? How you have managed not to throttle him (I meant the SS, but I guess, either of them)? I admire your patience, ma'am.

LRP75's picture

Actually, H handled the situation very well. In the past, hell even yesterday, he would have handled it entirely different and totally coddled the kid.

However, please read the other blog I just posted. The winds of change might be blowing our way.