Co Worker trying to convince me to be a 3rd parent
My co worker is trying to convince me that SD has 3 parents.
Co: well how is SD supposed to feel when she sees that you get all this stuff for DD but you don't get anything for her?
Me: like she has two parents that can provide what she needs for her and I'm not either of said parents.
I said that just because i don't buy extras doesnt mean SD isn't provided for (not that that is my responsibility). My addition to her life will always be felt just in the way her father can now do for her.
She has a place to visit and a stable place to lay her head. ✔
Food when she gets here. Thats part me.
She feels like she can even request to go to red lobster. I love my DH but he doesn't have random Red Lobster money for 3.5 people. But SD is comfortable enough to ask that because of the joint money DH and I have.
I told my co worker that i could never buy SD anything my whole life and almost anything her dad gives to her is because I helped to make it happen. So maybe I don't get her a Christmas gift. Hell, I don't even have to get her a birthday gift but she will remember how she spent the summers with us once her father and I married. She will remember her flower garden she and I planted. The books we read together, the foreign tv shows we watch, the makeup she watches me apply, the perfumes and lotions of mine she likes to play in and I act like i don't notice when we both know i see it. She'll remember the things shes confides in me that i almost always tell her dad and the 1 or 2 small things that maybe neither of her parents are fans of but they are just our secret. So yeah, maybe i don't spend money on her but that's not my job. (And in reality i do buy her gifts i just don't see it as my responsibility).
Co: that's playing favorites.
Me: my baby is my favorite. Duh? I can't recreate motherhood for a child that has an active mom..... And no one would really want me to.