Why do you think BM did this? I'm at a loss. BM also told her other two kids she has breast cancer.
BM finally went for her supervised visit with SD this past weekend. It was a 5 hour visit and when we picked up SD, she had tons of luggage. A suitcase full of nothing but shoes and a laundry basket with, what seemed like, all of SD's clothes from BMs place. Along with most of SDs toys and some books.
I'm confused..Why would BM pack up all of SD's things like that? I know it's always nice to have something familiar with you in a situation like this (DH has had temporary custody of SD since Jan) But why would she pack everything like that? Like she was shipping her off and giving up.
DH and I talked about it and I have two thoughts on this-FYI DH and BMs "trial" is tomorrow morning..this trial will determine whether SD stays with us or if she will go back with BM until the next hearing where they will decide-or the judge will decide- where SD stays for the duration of the custody battle. Only if BM doesn't go back to jail today..she has a trial for assault.
1. BM believes she has lost SD already and has given up on fighting for her. BM hasn't served or filed any responses for trial tomorrow.
2. BM believes she will get SD back tomorrow and decided it would be okay to have SD bring stuff over because she would get it back tomorrow.
Either way, seeing all her stuff packed up like that was really confusing for SD. She didn't say much about it, but when DH was hanging all her shoes, I could see the anxiety on SD's face. I know shes wondering why BM did this. She told DH "These are all my shoes" DH just said "I know. I don't know why mom packed em' all up like this, you'll need some when you go over there...I'm confused too." Once all her clothes were put away, SD seemed much better.
Oh, and I forgot to add...BM has been texting her other two kids(she didn't know they got new cell phones and BMs parents have their old cell phones) telling the other two kids "I have breast cancer. Read this message and then delete it" "Youre all I have left"
DH thinks that BM is wanting the kids to feel sorry for her. He says that BM loves attention and sympathy and no one else is feeling sorry for her right now, so she wants attention and sympathy from her kids. We don't believe she has cancer. She has never mentioned it before, even her best friend and sister don't believe it. Even if she does have cancer, I don't believe telling a child through a text message is the best way to go about breaking that horrible news.
What are your thoughts? Why would BM do this?
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I agree, with MazzyStar, it's
I agree, with MazzyStar, it's #1.
Not sure how old your SD is,
Not sure how old your SD is, but is it possible that BM is punishing SD for "choosing" to be with you and DH right now? I know it's warped thinking but bear with me.
My DH won temporary physical custody of our then-SS13 through the courts. Somehow, our BM thought that "DH had sued her" and "SS chose to live with DH". So she punished SS by doing the following:
- packed up all of his belongings in garbage bags and left them on the porch for days before DH could pick them up. Most of his stuff (cd's, games, electronics) was broken in the process.
- refused to see SS on any of her scheduled visitation. In fact, she refused to see him for almost an entire year.
- sent photo albums with pictures of SS, BM and her parents in happier times. She also sent cd's with pics and music of sappy love songs to really pull on his heart strings.
In our case, it was just BM and more of her PAS games.
SD is 9, 10 next week. BM has
SD is 9, 10 next week. BM has been telling SD that the "place" hadnt returned any of her emails or phone calls to see SD..DH called the visitation center and they told DH that BM hasnt once tried to contact them. But BM fianlly did her part and saw SD.
Is the supervised visit not
Is the supervised visit not going to stay supervised? My guess #1. if BM parents already got custody of the other 2kids. Then chances are SD will be staying with ya'll. BM may not even show up tomorrow. My ss also has supervised visit, DH did his part to get signed up on DEC.1. BM still hasn't signed up. So I guess she gave up to. BM has called us a few time trying to talk her way out of supervised visit, but it's not working this time. BM has to get right and prove it through actions not words.