SD14 and the pants dilemma
Before school started, so mid August, I took SD14 and SD16 shopping for clothes. SD16 picked out one pair of pants and 2 shirts, I tried to get her to get more, even offered to take her to a different place, but she said no. SD14 who is very self conscious about how thin she is found 5 pairs of pants, 5 shirts, and a sweatshirt. SD14 wore these clothes MAYBE 4 times each, and has since not worn the pants or sweatshirt. She started wearing only leggings which I assume came from BM's house.
So I've kept my mouth shut about her not wearing her clothes, she picked them out we bought them, and if she doesn't want to wear them that's on her,they are available to her. She has not asked us to buy more/ different stuff so I've been able to let it go, even though it drives me insane how wasteful it is.
SD14 started texting BM yesterday that she wants BM to take her shopping to buy new pants (telling her the ones she has don't fit), and that SD14 will pay for the pants. She asked BM to take her because BM lives close to the big city that has more clothing options compared to the small town we live in that's an hour away. BM then started harassing DH about SD14 buying pants here's the jist of the convo...
BM - SD14 wants me to take her to buy pants, she says she'll pay for them herself, I don't mind taking her but she should not be using her own money
DH - I've already talked to her about this, if you can take her that's great, I've told her I'd reimburse her up to a certain amount
BM - I will take her and pay for them and will just deduct it out of the CS I send you
DH - no, that's not your choice, I've worked out the finances with her
BM - I'm not going to let her pay for her own clothes, I send you thousands in CS every year, it's ridiculous that she doesn't have clothes that fit her
DH - never mind, this is non of your business anyways, I will take her when I can
BM - that CS is for food and clothes, I know you don't spend 700 a month on those
Ughh the whole thing is just stupid. Does she really thing CS is just for food and clothes? What about their cell phones that we pay for, school supplies, back packs, shoes, jackets, etc. she just loves to fight. I wouldn't be surprised if she either A. refused to take SD14 shopping then told her that DH won't allow her to or B. takes her shopping and actually does deduct it from CS even when DH told her not to.
ETA - I will say that SD14 has NOT grown in the past 4 months, she simply does not like the pants she picked out anymore so is claiming they "don't fit" she says they're too tight, which they aren't, not to mention the fact that she wants to wear LEGGINGS which are tighter than any regular pant/jean