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Help!!!! im losing the plot with my stepsons!

KimmiD's picture

OMG! a place to vent!
YAY! why didnt i think of this earlier!
well i am insane. i have completly lost the plot.

I have two boys 3 and 5 and my fiance has 3 boys, 7, 15 and 16.

they were all living with us however the 7 yr old has gone back to his mothers (thank god!)
i am having serious issues with EVERYTHING! i am feeling so overwhelmed with the whole blended family bizo. i dont know how to handle anything.

i have come from a emotional abusive relationship (which i was unhappy for ten years) and i am now nearly two years in to a relationship with my fiance. he is kind gentle beautiful and complelty different from my ex husband.

i have issues dealing with his seven year old. he has no sense of humour, not much of a personality and all he does is whine whine whine! i cant stand it. he talks really weird, like he has a speech thing (its sooo annoying) and to be honest i cant stand him! i then have huge feelings of guilt as i feel "i should" feel something for this kid. but i dont. i cant stand him cuddling me or being near me and he creeps me out. my partners 15 year is a lazy slob who has no idea about anything (literally he didnt know how to undo a lid on a bottle??) he has no respect for anything. i have purchased new furniture and he has trashed it! he puts food on the couch even though he has been banned from eating in the lounge room. he is sloppy, breaks and ruins everything!he never puts shit away or cleans up after himself.
the 16 year old has adhd and is very demanding in the way he talks (talks to me like shit) and is very very argumentitive. i find all the boys very exhusting. the 15 year old cant think for himself at all. they hate me telling them what to do. (im a evil stepmum) but their dad is at work during the day so i have to ask them to do stuff.
another example, the 15 year old got dog poo on his shoe so he used a knife to scrap it off in to the kitchen sink!! i said to him that that is absolutly disgusting, really horrid thing to do and he will need to wash out and disenfect the whole sink! (he couldnt even do that properly)
i have come from a family that broke down when i was 14 so i learnt to cook, clean and take care of myself and look out for myslef from that age. ok i made some mistakes but thats all part of growing up. these kids have no friggin idea about anything! how to do anything! or think!!! i am busy enough as my 3 year old is a very difficult child. it feels like im looking after 4 babies sometimes! the 16 yr old chcuks worse tanties then my 3 year old! lol
i feel that all the children will be the break of my current relationship.
i seriously think i have taken on way too much with the teenagers and the 7 yr old. i dont know what to do. im a t breaking point.
i dont like them that much and having to live with people you dont like is hard. how do you guys cope or deal with it?
i would be happy if it was just me and my two boys sometimes, or me my partner and my two boys but i cant ask my partner to choose me over his kids, because they are his flesh and blood.

i like my house to be tidy. im not a clean freak but it would be nice if they could just empty the bin just for once with out being told. (typical teenagers i know) some days i ...well lets be honest here, everyday i think to myself wtf am i doing taking on two teenage boys and a 7 year kid who is just really weird?
and my partner wants a baby of our own asap!


KimmiD's picture

oh god i know its a myth.blended families i dont think, are ever fully happy.

when ss whines dad gets very annoyed with him. he cant stand the noise that comes out of his mouth. everytime i talk or come up with a suggestion or an alternative idea ss cracks the poops with me, i cant win. so i just ignore the behaviour.
i feel like a second hand maid. i do everything in this frigging house and all iget in return is crap from all the boys.......sigh....