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Diagnosed with high blood pressure but it's only high when SDstb13 is here.

katielee's picture

A few nights ago I was feeling short of breath and had a really bad headache. I checked my blood pressure and it was REALLY high, like emergency level high. I don't have insurance so I couldn't go to ER. I took one of DH's blood pressure meds and it came down a little, then I went to the doc and got on a fairly high dose of blood pressure meds.

They didn't work. The only way I could get my blood pressure MANAGEABLE (though still not normal) was by taking Valium in addition to blood pressure meds. Before SD, BTW, I had never been on Valium or any other nerve pills in my life.

Last night SD went to BM's for her last week this summer. This morning my blood pressure is totally normal and I have taken no Valium, though I did go ahead and take my Blood Pressure meds.

My family and those who love me say SD is killing me and it's not okay. They threaten very often to come get me and take me away. Next week school will start back and SD will be back with us full time. I don't know if my health will handle it. I should have insisted she go back to live with BM while I had the chance:(

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BethAnne's picture

If leaving isn't an option, and neither is having SD live with her mom, can you find a few ways to try to help lower your bp whilst she is with you?

What does your husband say about the correlation? Is he concerned?

If I were you I would be looking at disengaging and focusing on yourself more. Getting away from the house two or three nights a week to do something that you find relaxing. Also taking time to yourself at home, reading or meditating or exercising or something. Trying therapy to get things off your chest and to help distance yourself and your emotions from your SD and her actions could help too.

The other things to think about are what else changes when you don't have SD with you. Do you drink less? eat differently? Take time to exercise? Do more relaxing things? Have more sex? (I know our sex life improves dramatically when SD isn't with us). And if you can identify anything, see how you can try to incorporate that into your life when SD is with you.

katielee's picture

I have recently joined the gym but haven't yet gotten into the habit of going regularly. I think if I am going to stay healthy I am going to have to be more dedicated. I am also trying to eat more natural foods... have read that higher potassium and magnesium foods can decrease blood pressure.

DH is in denial that my BP issues have anything to do with SD. He thinks my medicine finally "kicked in" but if it goes back up next week he will have no choice but to acknowledge that she is the cause of it.

The only thing I do differently is that I am much more stressed. It doesn't matter whether she is behaving or misbehaving. For some reason her mere presence stresses me out so badly my neck and shoulders ache and burn constantly. Not sure what to do except keep trying.