Why? Why? Why??????
I sent an email to our lawyer last week asking a few questions. He didn't respond. I emailed again this morning saying " Can you just please reassure us that the 29th is a solid hearing date so we can get plane tickets and that we aren’t going to be limited in court to only talk about the contempt? We can talk about the rest later. "
He responds back with :
"As of now the May 29th date is solidified but it’s only docketed for the contempt. I am reaching out to BM's Attorney to see if we can take up all matters on that date since we will be there, anyway. I do not know why he would have an objection to that."
I am so upset!! We were told when we filed the contempt that everything could be included. When DH signed the paperwork, we asked and our lawyer said that he would get it all scheduled for the same hearing date. That we can finally also have the hearing that was never had in NOVEMBER since the judge decided that SS needed a GAL. The GAL has filed his report. He is supporting a custody flip. DH hasn't been able to speak to SS since Oct 31 and hasn't seen him since September 14th. How much longer can this really be drug out??? Why hasn't our lawyer done his job?? We are already 38K in with this dude. We can't just get a new one now.
I talked to DH and this is how we responded:
"Please let us know as soon as possible if we can have everything on the docket. I am sure that BM's attorney will have an objection, otherwise BM would not be able to continue to waste or time and money.
Since BM's attorney has YET to file the paperwork for summer visitation or turn over BM's income (that they were told they had to file and turn over by Dec. 21 by the judge), can we file a 2nd contempt charge to help move this process along if he doesn’t agree to have the November court hearing finally continued?
We all know that if BM isn’t actually held accountable and if there is no order, SS will not be coming to us for the summer. We are already past the time to buy the plane ticket at a reasonable price. We can’t keep dragging this crap out! We are now sitting at 6 months of DH not being able to talk to his son and 8 months without seeing him.
If it is only the contempt being heard, DH and I discussed not flying out and being on the phone with you for the hearing. We just can’t afford to keep flying out for essentially nothing. Even when BM is found guilty of contempt, it won’t be like DH would even see a dime for it. We will literally just be wasting time and money. I know the contempt hearing has to happen to affect the custody hearing but it just isn’t feasible to fly there for just contempt."
Why? Why? Why???? Why does it have to be like this???
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If I were you I would assume
If I were you I would assume SS isn't coming to you for summer, barring something happening in court.
Is it possible that circumstances are to blame here, not the lawyer nor doing their job? Aka the court requires x to happen before y?
So, while you say to assume
So, while you say to assume that- The judge ordered 30 days to of the summer to be spent with in the summers with very specific dates back in March last year. BM's attorney just hasn't filed the journal entry. Though, since there is no entry there is no order. That is why I am pissed.
The judge also told BM's attorney that he had 30 days to have BM turn over income and have the JE entered when we were in court in November. The fact that we have been harping on our lawyer since January to do something about it pisses me the F off.
If SS doesn't come in the summer but we had the order, it would be a 2nd contempt charge. As of right now I don't think anything would happen.
Family Court sucks. Plain and
Family Court sucks. Plain and simple. This is why DH stopped fighting when SS was alienated. We had already easily spent 50K and it never goes anywhere. No one gets consequences for anything, not BM, not attorneys, no one.
He's not coming for summer visitation. It doesn't matter that the judge ordered it, BM will not get any consequences for this, at least not without you guys bankrupting yourselves and pushing your blood pressure through the roof.
I know your frustrations, and
I know your frustrations, and without getting into my own h3ll of a court case with my bios. It can go on for a LONG time. Mine took 3 years; even though I was promised in August I would have a court date by December.
Yes. A difficult person (your
Yes. A difficult person (your ex, I assume) can drag this stuff out forever.
There is so much damage done
There is so much damage done in those YEARS to a relationship between parents and children. I understand not making rush/rash decisions but in what are these courts thinking??? As long as the parent is not abusive:
And we all know
the GU BM treats those common sense items as a mere "serving suggestion" as courts seldom hold the BM accountable for their alienation tactics.
He was ordered to come for
He was ordered to come for spring break too.
I don't think it's your lawyer persay, its the system. It's very slow moving and often gets little results The chances that custody will flip with SS being so alienated at 14-15 are like 0.002%. I honestly would not be surprised if BM is just told to send him or worse, BM told SS doesn't have to go anymore. Do not get your hopes up.
Yes, exactly. SS just has to
Yes, exactly. SS just has to tell the judge he's terrified of DH and they won't make him go. Or they will start a whole new investigation to see why. Or BM will be ordered to make him go and then she won't, and it will take 6 more months to get to even start discussing that issue. The problem is that Family Court has no teeth. I think it's fairly well known that people are almost never found in actual contempt in Family Court.
I do know it's hard to let go of all of this, but just don't expect much.
Buy the ticket and also buy
Buy the ticket and also buy insurance on it. If SS does not come she's in contempt and you can ask for the cost of travel to be refunded and for extra makeup parenting time. Yes these things can drag out. Her and her lawyer can stall on every little thing and drag this out indefinitely. The good news is you can ask for reasonable legal fees. It would help if DH could fly out for the contempt hearing and also request a few nights visitation with ss. If BM did not bring ss it would be another contempt charge.
Why? Idiot lawyers and the
Why? Idiot lawyers and the even bigger morons in the stupid Harry Potter robes slinging the infantile Fischer-Price wooden hammer need to justify their existance. That is why.
IMHO of course.