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Blog Hog All Week!! -- Letter to Judge

justmakingthebest's picture

Since BM's attorney refuses to sign the journal entry ordered by the judge for summer visitation and our lawyer obviously charges us for every attempt to get his signature. I called the courthouse to find out our next step to make BM's lawyer do what he was supposed to. The clerk was very upset to hear that we had not gotten the journal entry in and that this has been dragging along since 2014. I did my best southern belle (mid west people seem to love that) and gave her a brief synopsys of what was happening. She told us to write a letter to the judge. She said the judge doesn't take kindly to his orders not being followed. So here is what I wrote and DH is going to tweak it, but let me know your thoughts:

Dear Judge _____,

 

            I was in your court on April 25, 2018 for a hearing that I thought that would finally provide me with visitation rights to my son, SS (13 yrs. old). It was determined that through a loop hole that we were only able to discuss summer visitation. At the end of the hearing you awarded me visitation with my son from July --- August ---annually.

 

            My issue, Your Honor, is that my ex-wife’s attorney will not respond to my attorney to make the journal entry that you ordered. I have spent tens of thousands of dollars at this point in trying to have a relationship with my son and I am being cut off at every turn. It is to the point where even my phone access has been cut off and I only recently found out that my son’s mother removed him from my phone plan, lied about it to me, had my son lie to me, all to keep me from being a part of his life.

 

            I can no longer financially support this fight in alienation from my child. I have another special needs son who lives with me as well as a wife and two other step children that I help support. Please, Your Honor, hold BM's Layer from Hell, responsible for signing this journal entry to allow the summer visitation that you ordered.

 

I am active duty military. I am and have been serving my country. I paid alimony to an ex-wife whom lied to me and then left me alone in Virginia without my son. I pay child support every month. I still owe my attorney thousands. I just want to be a father to my son.

 

Thank you for your consideration,

Justmakingthebest's DH

Comments

ProbablyAlreadyInsane's picture

I would probably leave out the "lawyer from hell" part and just leave it at lawyer. Sounds more professional. Other than that it looks good Smile

WalkOnBy's picture

Yep - leave out the cell phone stuff, you can just say that your phone access has now been removed.  Do NOT call the other lawyer names.

short and to the point is best.  "You ordered XYZ back on such and such date, and it still has not happened and here is why.  Please help us figure out a way to get the other attorney to respond.  Thank you" is all you need.

 

justmakingthebest's picture

Mrs. Fireball abd WalkonBy- How would you word the cell phone stuff. I kind of feel like it is important to state that BM lied and told SS to lie about the new number. 

WalkOnBy's picture

I would say "Your Honor, despite your ruling on such and such date that my parenting time should be blah blah blah, Ms. ExWife's lawyer has yet to sign off and thus far has not responded to my attorney's requests.  As a result, my time with son has been limited and recently Ms. ExWife has cut off phone access by removing son from my cell phone plan and refusing to provide me with the new phone number."

I understand you want the judge to know that she had your kid lie to you, but honestly?  He isn't going to give two shits about that.  Leave it out.  It will only make you look bad

TrueNorth77's picture

Yes, good idea! I hope it works. I would leave out the part about the ex-wife lying and leaving him alone in VA. Maybe just say "I have paid alimony and I pay child support, and still owe my attorney thousands. I just want to be a father to my son". Judges hear so many accusations, I think they get a little numb to them, so sticking to the point gives him more credibility and makes him sound less "jaded and bitter", if you will.

justmakingthebest's picture

I wasn't sure about that line, I did want to include that it wasn't his choice to have his son move out of state. How can I achieve that?

TrueNorth77's picture

I honestly don't even know if you need to address that- I'm sure the judge can figure that out, since DH obviously went to court and fought, and is now here trying to get visitation. I think you're a lot like me in that you want to say as much as possible, and make sure all points are covered- but I don't think that one point would change his mind. Judges are very matter-of-fact about things- they often don't even need to hear all the details before being able to make a decision. I can't imagine he wouldn't make her lawyer sign that visitation document with just the basics listed.

nengooseus's picture

But the judge didn't care when you were in court, so bringing it up again may just make him mad.  You need to make your DH look as sympathetic as possible.

nengooseus's picture

To help you isn't the right place to adjudicate issues that you weren't allowed to bring up in court.  It's a time for your DH to evoke as much sympathy as possible so that the journal entry can be pushed through. 

Normally, this kind of letter would come from your attorney, but since this is coming directly from DH, best to mind all Ps and Qs.

tog redux's picture

I would leave everything out except - you ordered this and I didn't get it because BM and her lawyer won't comply.  That's it.  That's all the judge cares about.

We had a situation where BM refused to respond to her lawyer to settle division of money when they got divorced - DH's lawyer got it back to the judge and he signed it without her cooperation.  Why can't DH's attorney appeal to the judge?

justmakingthebest's picture

Very good question that we aren't being answered on. We are hemoraging money on this and are trying to handle it ourselves at this point. 

secondplace's picture

I would leave out this part " as well as a wife and two other step children that I help support.".  The judge won't give a rats ass who else you have to support (if they aren't your bio or adopted children).

justmakingthebest's picture

Thanks for the feedback everyone! DH and I are making revisions tonight!

Ispofacto's picture

I would leave out the part about DH supporting his new kids and stepkids.  Judges hate it when they perceive parents taking on new responsibilities when they had prior obligations.

 

notsurehowtodeal's picture

comes across like you are trying to re-try the custody case. All that is going to do is make the judge angry. Follow the format that The-Sane-One or Walk-on-By gave you and you will probably get what you want.

I know you want the judge to know all of the extra information, but he doesn't care about any of it. At this point your are just trying to get the paperwork signed - leave everything else out of your letter.