Teens and their friends
When I was a teenager and went to friends' houses I always remember making polite conversation with their parents. When I had friends over they did the same. SS15 brings friends home and they act like DH and I are invisible. Not a word or glance our way they just hightail it to SS's room as quick as possible. Is that just how teens are these days? SS15 wants two friends to stay the night tonight and I want to say no but for no other reason than I think they're rude and mannerless. It's not like they make a bunch of noise or raid the kitchen of all the food they just don't seem to have a clue about how to exchange polite greetings with adults.
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This is what I mean: *SS15
This is what I mean:
*SS15 and friends walk in*
Me: hey guys, we had pizza so if y'all are hungry it's on the stove.
*all three walk past me as if it were just the wind whispering and not an actual person saying something to them*
An hour later SS15 emerges to get pizza for him and friends, interacts with us. Friends don't emerge from the room for anything until the coast is clear.
That's what I'm saying, is
That's what I'm saying, is this just how it is now? I'm not around any teenagers other than SS15. What's funny is that we have a neighbor kid that's the same age as my SS15 and he's always impeccably polite to me. He greets me on the sidewalk, says yes ma'am, no ma'am, please, thank-you, etc. His mom told me not to long ago that he got kicked off the bus for being a little turd. What a weird world.
Well one of the kids over
Well one of the kids over here tonight is rich and has parties at his house all the time. His parents are supposedly the coolest people ever according to SS. I'm pretty sure that one's just an asshole. Not sure what the deal is with the other one bc I've never even heard his voice.
That kid sounds like a dream
That kid sounds like a dream come true but yes I'm sure he'll be stuck in the friend zone quite often bc most young ladies tend to go for the jackasses.
They are rude, pure and
They are rude, pure and simple. Not saying hello and not acknowledging someone when spoken to are rude behaviors. It has nothing to do with it being 2016 or them being teenagers. If it were me I would call them out on it and force them to interact with me. I would not stand for being ignored in my own home. If their behavior continued to be rude then yes I would strongly consider banning them and most definitely would not be getting them pizza especially for their visits.
My kids friends are all very
My kids friends are all very talkative with us. We have known most of them since they were in kindergarten, some of them since they were about 7 or 8, they are 13 and 15 now. And, we are friends with most of the parents, GOOD friends. If they were ever rude to me, I would call them out on it in a heartbeat. I can't see them doing that though. Some of SS's friends come over even when he isn't there. LOL. Most recently, SS was at his grandparents for the day, one of his best friends had stayed the night before he left. When SS left I asked him if he wanted me to take him home or if he wanted to go shopping with us (Costco) he opted to shop with us. They are all very comfortable with DH and I.
Just had this same issue last
Just had this same issue last night with SD15 and her 6 friends at the house, whom none of them even said hello to us. We decided to talk to SD15 and say "we think its rude your friends come in our home and don't even say hello to us or give us the opportunity to say hello and put a name with the face." We are also telling her we EXPECT her to seek out the parents and say hello when she goes to their home and "thank you" before you leave.
I'm not even wasting my time being subtle, obviously she and her friends have no manners so its time to teach them.
Just take command of your
Just take command of your home.
finch: Hey, guys, want pizza?
kids: **crickets**
finch: (moving over to stand in doorway of hallway before they reach it) Excuse me, fellas, in this house we do have some rules. You greet people when you enter a room. You say please and thank you. And you answer questions from adults. I know, I know, all hideous and stuff but what you gonna do? So, let's try that again, "Hi, guys!" (prompting) "Hi, Missus Finch, nice to see you."
kids: mumble mumble
Finch: Great! Ok, you want pizza? (prompting) "thanks, maybe later?" "sure, we're starving?" "Oh, thanks Mrs. Finch, but I'm allergic to junk food?"
If kids don't get into the spirit of this because you have been not only firm but a bit humorous and quite friendly, then you've got a tough crowd. In which case, you get tough, too. Finch: "I see! Ok, then, well, I was cleaning out the fridge so I'll just get back to that." Then proceed to either eat the pizza yourself in front of them or throw it out. Consider the wasted food an investment in parenting.
If you are not able to coax and cajole these boys into some better behavior in three visits I would stop allowing them over. You probably won't have to go that far because they will stop coming anyway. Problem solved.
Lol I agree!! Spot on what
Lol I agree!! Spot on what you wrote.
Lol we do not allow food in
Lol we do not allow food in the bedrooms. So if ss friends want a snack-welp- you have to come downstairs or do not eat. We do allow popcorn upstairs for sleepovers.
It's awkward dealing with kids and teens.
You have to let them know you will not be walked all over.
Ss13 is an odd duck, so his friends are odd too. One kid we had over talked in a robot voice the whole time he was here. Another kid had this really weird laugh. But they all talked to us, most used please and thank yous.
I've also had a kid over that's not allowed in our house anymore. He figured out ss is a push over, and would ask ss for his stuff, after the third time he came over and left with a video game. I told the kid that's the last thing he is taking. Told ss if he can't tell him No then he is not allowed inside. Kid has not been inside since, he usually meets him at the playground.
Not everyone is a "friend".
If the kids don't want to talk to you that's fine, but I'd try one more time and if they are rude tell ss they cannot come inside and ignore you.