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Happy holidays! (Where's the rum?)

JEEMudder's picture

Every year I look forward to Christmas, despite the drama the holidays will inevitably bring to my little blended family.
This year the petty little things are building up quickly...

-BM keeps 'liking' and commenting on my in-laws Facebook activity. It has been happening since I met DH but is more frequent during holidays. I think it pisses me off more that the in-laws respond politely or even have her on their friends lists at all. She is the evil cow witch who cheated on DH (their son/brother) and ran away with SD7 to another country so we only get to see her a few times a year. In their shoes I would have a hard time not swearing at her every chance I get, never mind exchanging pleasentries!

- we bought a few smaller gifts for SD7 and BD7 and a couple of bigger gifts for them to share this year. This was done because a BM is a lazy slob who doesn't clean and doesn't encourage SD7 to take care of her things so all of her toys get lost of come to ruin very quickly, so we decided things like the easy bake oven and video games will stay here to be played with when she visits. This is an issue because DH thinks we need to compensate for her lack of gifts to take home by buying a few extra small gifts for her. Can you say HELL NO!

-we get sd7 on alternating Christmas' so last year we had her on Christmas Day so she spends Christmas Day this year with BM and will join us for the remainder of her Christmas break on the 27th... DH thinks we should all open presents together... Say it with me...HELL NO. I have two children and BD7 and BD2 are opening presents on the 25th, including the shared gifts. SD7 will not suffer because she is opening a few less when she arrives. She will most certainly get spoiled by BM.

I just hate that despite our 4 years together DH's world never stops revolving around this kid... He claims to love me and our other kids just as much but it is SO blatantly obvious that his first born sits in the throne and wears the crown, it makes me SICK! I know I signed up for this, but i just want one comfortable drama free holiday and the knowledge that having that is almost defiantly not going to happen in driving me to drink.

...now where did I put that rum?..

Comments

learningallthetime's picture

I agree with your position on shared gifts, but personally we always moved Christmas to fit the schedule. BS never was worried. This year I am working over Christmas, so we will be having it a day later. BS is 7, he is clueless on dates. I personally always preferred it to be all the kids together so it would be early/late/on time. We did not have extended family visit, so it really made no difference.

JEEMudder's picture

That would not work for us and frankly seems unfair. My children will enjoy Christmas on Christmas like every other child celebrating in our part of the world

purpledaisies's picture

Op you have every right to want to do Christmas on the day of just like almost everyone else including Bm and skids. I always always have Christmas on the day of no matter what.

This is how I do it: every other year we have skids on the eve and they open their gifts from us along with my kids. However I always have bought my kids more then skids so I can give my kids gifts from me their mom when skids are with their mom getting gifts from her.

It's not fair to the other kids to put things on hold b/c one kid or kids is not there as they ARE getting gifts at that time with someone else. these are kids that ahold be able to enjoy the holiday as well in all its magic as well as skids do.

whatwasithinkin's picture

it angers me that he would want your small children to wait for their stepsister to open presents. why would he do that to his other two children. Santa comes but one night a year and that is the 24th of December.

you would think that when sd gets there it is literally the second coming of Christ.

he couldnt be more wrong on this one

JEEMudder's picture

Thank you! It is SO good to know I am not crazy and selfish. SD will be opening presents with BM on Christmas day and my kids will be opening them here.
Last night I told DH that if he doesn't like it he can go open presents with BM and SD! He did not like that idea! Lol