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Narcs and animals

Jcksjj's picture

Anyone else here have BMs or skids (or anyone else in their lives) with narcissistic traits that use animals as one of their "I'm such a wonderful person" covers. Like, they just loooove animals so much, but at the same time they dont want to actually have to take care of the animal or would just kick it to the curb once it inconveniences them.

The majority of self centered, narc-y people I've known were like that, so I'm assuming it's common. BM is like that, and now SD does it too and it drives me crazy. Maybe a month or two ago, SD told me she doesn't miss any of us when shes gone except the dog. I responded with "you only miss the dog?" "Well the dog really misses me." Yeah, trust me SD, I already knew that was exactly what your thought process was on that.


sharlyns's picture

I do! My skids shows people what they wanna see..yet he don't feed or give water to his dog..killed his turtle and fish...yet everyone thinks he's cute!

Chmmy's picture

SD17 loves dogs all over her Facebook posts. Trashes her father on Facebook because he will not allow her to have a dog(knowing the care would fall on dh and i). 

I dogsit for friends and family when they go out of town so Ive brought dogs in the house a lot and she shows little to no interest. I think the guy she liked loves dogs so she posts dog stuff to get likes from him.

Jcksjj's picture

Oh that sounds like BM. Whenever shes interested in someone new she all of a sudden has the exact same interests as them. Even if it's the opposite of the interests she had the month before. She actually literally told my friend that she went to high school with and was trying to be friends with again (failed, my friend has hated her since before I even knew any of them) "omg, we're like the same person" 

strugglingSM's picture

BM is terrible with animals. Nearly two years ago, she bought a high energy dog, even though she and her DH are both very sedentary people. I'm not sure why she bought this breed, instead of a dog that would be happy with sitting around the house all day. About six months later, SKids started telling us that the dog had "dog ADHD" according to BM and needed to be medicated. I think the dog had actually gone crazy, because I don't even think it was getting one full walk a day, I think it was just let out into BM's tiny back yard to run around. A few months ago, SKids told us that the dog got in trouble for digging up the carpet in BM's bedroom, because their stepbrother had put the dog in there and closed the door. 

BM also bought a second cat about six months before getting the dog. Maybe 15 months after getting that cat, because she just had to have another pet (they already had one cat), BM gave the new cat away because she was "too mean" to stay with their family. 

I don't know if BM presents herself as an animal lover, but she loves to brag about her pets...while also not really taking care of them. She was so proud of the breed of dog she got, as if it was a badge of honor that her dog was "purebred", but she totally neglected it to the point of insanity. SKids rarely talk about the dog, so I don't think it's a big part of their lives. I also think that the only reason she got a dog is because DH told SKids that maybe we would get a dog and she had to get one first. 

thinkthrice's picture

The Girhippo and skids are supposedly "animal lovers" yet every pet they have they have given back to the shelter,  said pet has been neglected, abused or mysteriously run away.  

sharlyns's picture

I think neglect is on NM purpose! Everyone knows animals need to eat! 

Now I'm taking care of his 2 dogs which one almost starved to death!

Jcksjj's picture

Okay, true. I guess what I meant was it from neglect or actively trying like beating them or taking the fish out of the water or something.

Exjuliemccoy's picture

My mother was a huge animal lover. Growing up, we were running a rescue before the term was coined. So when DH and I started dating, I sat down with him and said "You need to know that I am and will always be an animal person. If you aren't, you probably shouldn't waste your time".  Three decades on, he's a bigger bleeding heart than I am. We've had many pets over the years, many successful rescues and remain committed to helping animals.

OSD is NOT an animal person. She is, however, a highly narcissistIc bottom feeding GU who thought nothing of exploiting DH and I for $$$.  Still, when she told me she felt the gskids were old enough to get a dog, I was happy for them and offered to help out with the adoption costs since her H was unemployed at the time. Imagine my surprise when she called to tell me she'd found the perfect dog - a purebred rare breed (Her favorite) pup from a breeder 2,000 miles away. And it was only $700 plus shipping! She was not pleased when I told her that I would only pay for her to adopt a rescue.

A few years later and after we went No Contact, I heard through the grapevine that OSD has somehow managed to get one of these large, hyperactive, overly bred dogs. It attacked one of the gskids, so she had it euthanized. Yet another reason why I want nothing to do with that ignorant narc. Grrrrrrr.


GrabitAndGo's picture

WHY don't people do some research before adopting animals?  Drives me insane!

I'm not really outdoorsy anymore, and I live in a condo.  I'd like to have a dog, but realize my lifestyle and lack of a fenced in yard prevent that since it wouldn't be fair to the pup.

I'm with you, Julie, on the rescues.  Why pay a ton of money for a cat or dog, when there are plenty of loving animals in shelters who would love to find their furever homes.


Winterglow's picture

I'd love a dog too and we have 2.5 acres for it to run around on. However, I just don't have the time to train it and take care of it (I believe that dogs need discipline and structure) so that will probably just remain a dream. Too bad. I have a pretty low-maintenance cat who loves having all this territory so my furry needs are met anyway Smile

All of my cats have been rescues apart from one who came from a friend whose cat had a litter.

Eve-Bee's picture

Oh, yes! Narc SD20 tried this one when she was 17. She is lazy as can be but really needs people to admire her to get her narc supply. She was announcing to everyone that she was going to adopt a street dog from Romania. I saw what she wanted and said, That will be really boring for you when people your age travel the world, and you have to sit at home and watch the dog because we will never ever babysit or walk that dog. It is the same as getting a baby when you are young; You have to sit at home, have barely any money because everything will go to the baby, and we will not pay, and everything you do is for someone else. In contrast, all your friends will have the freedom to put themselves in the center of everything they do. You will watch their indulgences on social media. *poof* Now, she does not want a dog or a baby(which she before had said that she wanted when she was 18). Instead, she wants to travel the world and work with the red cross in Africa, taking care of children in need (she is, of course, too lazy to do the Africa thing, but traveling is doable), but the thought of how people will admire her for it hits her narc desires. 

Twix's picture

Yes! BM loves dogs so much she breeds hers as often as she can. 
She also loves to get the skids all sorts of cats, dogs and lizards that they keep for a few months, get rid of, then replace! 

bananaseedo's picture

Yep, BM was like this too.  Now she's had a dog about a year-lets' see how long this one lasts.  SD is definately an animal lover but she tends to neglect/abandon them or expect others to pay for them.  Our dogs adore her though, they got absolutely nuts in a good way when she visits.