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I'm no Saint, but self-proclaimed "Christian" bio mom is the DEVIL!

J23wheeler's picture

A decade of "dealing" with this evil woman has taken its toll. I'm full of resentment, bitterness, and hatred. And I'm not proud of it! Ten years ago, I moved in with her ex-husband who has three kids with her. All three lived with us at some point in their lives, but the two youngest chose to live exclusively with us during their high school years. The youngest, now 18, has one year left, his Senior year. In case you were wondering, all three are highly intelligent. Mom merely chose a late kindergarten start for them. Anyway, as of late, after abiding by most of the experts' advise of constantly taking the high road, I've finally cracked! Bio mom has never said a nice word about me...ever! In fact, for several years, she referred to me as "Fatty" and "Loser". She has thrown paper wads at me during the youngest's football games (yes, you read that right...even though I was the one who washed his uniform), has stalked both my Bf and myself to the point we finally filed criminal trespassing charges, has tried to run my car off the road - with her own child and his friend in the car, and has now somehow convinced her son to judge our lifestyle because we are living in sin. (Still not married). Mind you, this woman had two church going male friends during the first six years - of course to her children, she never slept with either of them. Yet, it just so happens that one of those men paid for an entire year of the oldest's college tuition, and the other bought the middle daughter a car (because the one we gave her wasn't nice enough - an older Camry). You know. And the real icing on the cake is that before she remarried nearly three years ago, she moved in with the guy! According to her, and the justification she gave her kids was that it was different for them. They were not living in sin because they were planning on getting married! What a gigantic hypocrite! Yet, now her son is being manipulated by his mother and he is requesting, well, highly insinuating his life would be better if I (the sinful one) would leave his household! Ever since this crap went down, I've been so pissed and so disappointed that he can't see right through her hypocritical bull! I've even found myself saying bad things about her, which I never did even when she was at her worst. I know I'm not supposed to do that! But it almost feels like I have suddenly developed Tourette's. When I'm angry, her name just spews from my mouth! What am I to do? Please help!


just.his.wife's picture

The kid is an adult. He is 18.. no need to protect delicate fee fees... let 'er rip!

just.his.wife's picture

Or beat BM at her own game.

See according to the bible, the only reason for divorce is adultery. IF your parterns and BM's divorce paperwork does not specifically state adultery: in gods eyes they are still married/ not divorced and BM is committing bigamy by remarrying.

If it does state adultery per the bible only the injured spouse (the one that got cheated on) is eligible to remarry.

Here's some info... have fun with it and beat her to death with biblical quotes! Smile

J23wheeler's picture

The fact that he IS an adult is the subconscious reason I beleive I can not hold back any longer. We had a GREAT relationship until he started visiting his mother so much and going to church with her. Their behavior is an embarrassment to the very religion they say they support. It makes me sick!

thinkthrice's picture

I'll never forget when OSS (he was about 8 or 9 at the time) pointed his chubby little index finger at daddykins and said "Mommy said that only BAD people get divorced so that makes you BAD!"
This was with his siblings listening and nodding their bobble heads in agreement. AT the time SD was 7, and YSS was 3.

BTW the BM filed for divorce shortly after Chef did whilst waiting for her to do it for almost 2 years--in other words how DARE you file for divorce ahead of MEEEEEE!!!!

So the ONLY time that Chef ever stuck up for himself until then was when he opened his mouth and started listing all the BM'S RELATIVES WHO WERE DIVORCED INCLUDING THE EVER SO HOLY GBM WHO HAD BEEN DIVORCED THREE TIMES

Their jaws DROPPED in unison and their eyes were as WIDE as saucers. Didn't have any effect though. The continued to beer bong the PAS Koolaid.

TheWicked's picture

The SS who lives in your home wants you to leave because you aren't married? Tell him the old joke: I prayed to God for a bike but then I realized God doesn't work that way so I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.

Or point out that in almost every story of Jesus in the bible someone is telling Jesus that the person He is dealing with is blah blah blah. Know what Jesus says EVERY time? Mind your business!

ItsGrowingOld's picture

Your SO (boyfriend) needs to shut this crap down with his son. Pronto!!

What does your BF say when his kids act up like this? Does he have your back?

J23wheeler's picture

My boyfriend has tried to shut it down. His son even said he was upset because he never got a say in who moved in. His dad told him that's not the way life works! Lol he also said he needed to mind his own business and stop judging the very people who have constantly been there for him. His son and I are now playing the silent game. Other than a blow up about his mom from me, which obviously made matters worse, we have not said any words to each other. Now my boyfriend is saying it isn't responsibility to have a conversation with his son. I just can't do it. I can not handle the childish behavior and hypocritical manipulation any more! I know it would end up with me blowing up again!

IamexhaustedSM's picture

I have been dealing with this on and off for 10 yrs. It sucks. All 3 skids have tried to demand DH have contact with, be friends with, meet with BM. DH won't do it. The woman is evil and hides behind her bible. Yet she was the dirty rat.

BM was in a gang all by herself and her initiation was to sleep with every man or woman she could no matter their relations to DH. DH was granted custody of skids twice. Once in their hometown and again down here in my town when they finally divorced. Skids are now 27, 25, 22. There b-days just past and DH did call them or speak to them. He is truly done. Especially since he raised them, we paid for them and BM was her crazy, bitter, hateful, spiteful, mean, vindictive, dirty whoring self.

If your SO backs you then you just have to decide if you can handle disengaging from skids and literally walking away from them if their crazy starts to show. If your SO is not backing you and you are left floundering by yourself and cannot defend yourself and point out that evil deeds of BM and her fork tongue then you need to decide if this is where you really should be.

It got so bad in my house last year I was ready to walk. I decided we will first go to counseling and then I would decide. Best thing I ever did. DH understands my side now and it is not me trying to tear down his grown ass kids but his kids trying to pull our home apart and casualties be damned. SS is not allowed back inside my home. At this point OSD is not allowed in our home. All 3 are up BMs butt or just living their own lives, I honestly do not know. I no longer keep track of them and I no longer have to hear about them. I do listen to DH though because I am his wife and we are supposed to be there for each other.

J23wheeler's picture

Wow! I can totally see all three ganging up on this house. It has happened in the past, with little participation from the youngest. They tend to call or text each other any time something doesn't go their way, so it's only a matter of time that his sisters will join in with their craziness...all for what or whom, no one knows! Only thing I know is he eavesdropped on an adult conversation I was having, which included the terrible treatment I have received from his Hypocritical mother, and that's when it all started. He jumped my ass, and I jumped his right back. It's not as though I went up to him and said his mom is a nasty, vengeful, manipulative, hump back, Wicked Witch of the West looking bitch. One would have thought so though. Or that I carried on that private conversation in his bedroom....

IamexhaustedSM's picture

Yup they are real good at ganging up on DH and me and then when one pisses the other off they throw each other so far under the bus it is epic. No loyalty, no respect, but for some reason SM are to respect the bitch that birthed them, calls us all kinds of names, and we are the ones buying their clothing, feeding them and taking care of them. It is unbelievable. I hung up my SM hat back between February and July last year. I was DONE!

I would still be cordial and professional with them but that is as far as it goes. Hi, RUN TO MY BEDROOM, if they were ever in my home again. They would have to step to me and make it right.

SS did hear me call BM a bitch once but she signed as payer on all of YSD hospital papers. Do not expect us to pay when I already wrote a check from MY personal account, $200.00, to cover the partial co-pay. Bitch could not even stay for the surgery. I did apologize to SS and told him that what I said was inexcusable. I walked into a room he was in while on the phone with BM. She called me to tell me to make DH call her. LOL I told BM, I will never hold a gun to his head and make him do anything. She did that to OSD, reason DH finally divorced OSD. She hung up, I called her a bitch. It was very high school. I do not regret it.

thinkthrice's picture

Gee I can't IMAGINE why you haven't legally married into this rat's nest of drama!! I've been with biodad for 11 years--it seems an ETERNITY. In my case to, the BM is an "all american, girl next door, corn fed soccer mom, church lady lutheran who rose from the ashes of divorce as a phoenix"

She and her mom who have had more pairs of men's boots under their bed (and probably some horse shoes as well) than I can even imagine, call themselves church going christians and will bad mouth me (and Chef--my "SO"-although that can be well deserved but not for the reasons THEY site) to ANYONE and EVERYONE in their town of 5,000.

I'm actually grateful that all three of his, despite the crushing monetary drain of CS, have PASed out. They were truly instruments of Beelzebub; trained at the hand of their "saintly" mother. And yes she's been remarried for almost six years now. Frankly I don't know how her husband manages that circus of ferals--although OSS DID move out and emancipate "early" (which is before 21 in NYS)

omgstop's picture

"In my case to, the BM is an "all american, girl next door, corn fed soccer mom, church lady lutheran who rose from the ashes of divorce as a phoenix" - this is PRICELESS hahahahahahahahaaa

Voldemort, "will no longer live in fear and guilt- for she has paid for what she's done" and also valiantly and bravely AROSE FROM THE ASHES OF DIVORCE as an enlightened, yoga-practicing, Louis Vuitton-toting, Free People Wearing Yogi. It's AWESOME.

princessmofo's picture

"She and her mom who have had more pairs of men's boots under their bed (and probably some horse shoes as well) than I can even imagine,"

I love you, Thrice! Awesome!

J23wheeler's picture

I would love to do that! Afraid BF would see me as the enemy and get rid of me instead. Then again, I've thought about letting the boys handle the house for a month or two. His son has already stated what I do around here is easy work.

hereiam's picture

I have a "Christian" BioMother to my stepson who blamed her DUI on communion wine.

What? Is she Thumbelina? How can you get drunk on communion wine?

J23wheeler's picture

Oh yes. She too has told her children we are going to hell. Has shouted that in front of our neighbors. My BF's response was great. He said, "Damn. Just when I thought I'd get lucky and never have to see you again"...

J23wheeler's picture

So funny you call her whackadoodle! I've used that name, too! The neighbor kids call her a creeper and alert me whenever they see the creeper van approaching the house. Did I mention the police were called an embarrasing amount of times? All because she made scenes in our front yard, often in front of the neighbor kids! Thank God her new husband moved her out of this town!