50/50 custodies and the frustrations outside the homes.
I'm wondering if anyone else has a 50/50 custody arrangment with no one being primary. We do and it is so frustrating when you deal with schools, doctors offices and pretty much anythig else because the forms have room for only one address for the child. No one is primary so who do you put down. We prefer it be us because BM does not comunicate with us very well unless she needs money for it or doesn't want to do it herself. Places will refuse to send notification out to both addresses because parents are supposed to be mature responsible adults and get along well enough to communicate about thier kids. Well sometimes they don't. Sometimes they do and you just forget to tell the other parent. Sometiemes games are played like BM does not want BF at the paretns night so she does not tell Bf about it and even makes the kid call BF up and cry taht BF was not there when BF had no idea that the night even happended becasue notification got sent home to BM's house and she played her games. It would be really nice if society would adapt better for these situations. Why not come up with different forma for the kids of blened families or let kdis wiht two households have two fomrs on file one for eahc household. Why not send take home folders to both custodial parenst homes. It's a PIA. What is another copy another stamp to them? Nothing when it can save some emotional heartache in a kids life and keep all parents involved. Its really annoying because I know our states ourst push for more and more of the 50/50 custody so both parents have the same rights then other instituison do not change the way they work and their equal rights have to be fought for every day, whether they are fighting with BM or BF or fighting with the schools for proper access to information. Its not 1952 where every one stasy married. More than half of all kids come from split, mixed blended homes to really when is society going to change? When are people going to learn how to deal with blended families in a way the is best for the kids, its a reality that the blended family is not going away so seriously can't we get a little more respect and guidance in our lives? I feel all we get are sterotypes, stigmas and being judged for not having the perfect family. I fele like professionals dont know how to deal with blended families so how the heck are we supposed to figure out how to deal with it on our own.
Oh this reminds me of the funny solution to this that my SD15 used to have. She was going to be kid rock star and build a mansion where both her families could live under one roof. She accepted mom and dad would not get back together, and liked her step parents she just hated going back and forth between homes because she missed the other while she was away.. Ha Ha could you imagine being that blended and living under the same roof ex spouses and first spouses siblings, half siblings, step siblings etc... all together. YIKES !!!