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BM Going on Vacation for "Emotional Support" but Can't Pay Her Bills - Someone Help Me Out Here!

iloveit's picture

Soooo before getting into a huge argument with SO this weekend about...what else, the damn DIVORCE...he gave me a little update on the latest BM scam.

A little background first:

When SO and BM separated almost 2 years ago, SO was a little unprepared and not only was he not allowed in the house (the house HE pays a mortgage on that is also in HIS name and BM has never once contributed to) but he also was unable to get money from his bank account as a cushion. When he informed BM he no longer wanted to be married to her she went ballistic and left him an hour north where they were away for the weekend and took his car leaving him there alone. Luckily they were at a place where he knew some people and took one of their cars back home where he stayed with a friend for the night. The next morning he went to the bank in the morning as soon as it opened to get some cash. Once he reached the counter to withdraw money the teller said, "I'm sorry sir but there is no money left in this account." He looks over at the drive through window and who does he see out there??? BM of course! The bitch drained that account SECONDS before he could get anything, took about $10,000 AND his guitar (which has never been seen again). So luckily SO had another account with some money in it so he was ok for a little while until he could iron things out with the lawyers etc.

In the meantime BM took that money and went on vacation to Florida, then she went to Arizona to see family and then finally to California. So of course this has come up in the midst of all this court/mediation drama and SO wants to know...what happened to this money that you STOLE? The response from her lawyer was that she used it to go on vacation for "emotional support!" WOW. REALLY??? I'm going to need a lot of emotional support for having to deal with all this divorce crap myself so I'm thinking I could just steal some money from my parents...I am definitely entitled to it. Well she has also been crying poor house saying she can't pay for mediation, no money...she can't afford the cable/electric/any utility bill in the money. She can't pay her phone bill, can't live the way she needs money. This is very interesting because as I mentioned in the last blog, SO paid ALL of these ridiculous bills longer than he should have. She gets temporary alimony PLUS she doesn't pay the mortgage at the house either so where is this moeny going. Well SO just caught wind that BM is going across the country AGAIN in April for a week! So how is it that she can afford flights to all these places yet cannot manage to help with mediation etc? Oh because she is going for "emotional support."

I cannot believe seems so wrong. Anyone been through this before? It seems ludacris that a judge would consider this as emotional support but not hold her accountable for any of the bills she insists she cannot pay and demands for my SO to cover?? My SO is bullshit.

What do you guys think? What can he do???


iloveit's picture

You know the deeper we get into this...I can totally see how someone gets to that point of desparation. Lucky for your DH he was able to get past it THANK GOD! I see it in my SO especially even the last few weeks that he is getting increasingly more angry and frustrated. It's so discouraging to feel like you are doing the right thing but then to be told that giving any extra $ for ANY reason is the WRONG way to handle it. I think my SO is confused by that but I put it in perspective over the weekend based on what you all told me last week. I told him that overpaying alimony or extra for any bills etc is something he did because he is obviously a good man and does not want to see people he cares about living in squaller blah blah blah. While I understand this and respect the reasons why he did it...none of that matters to the court/judge/lawyers and it's all about how this situation looks on paper and what the laws are with regard to what he was SUPPOSED to pay. I told him to again take the emotion out of it and look at it just as he promised he would: it's a business/financial transaction. That's it. After this latest thing though...I'm pretty sure he's officially done feeling sorry for her or anyone else and just wants to be done. He told me he's going to fight dirty now since that's obviously the way she's trying to stick it to him. He's done with all the crying and complaining that he's trying to screw her over (NEVER the intention) and it's time to go to court. I'm not sure if he's speaking to his lawyer about this one but I know for a fact he does know about it and it will definitely come up during the battle in mediation in a couple weeks. I hope you're right maux...I need for him to stand his ground, HE needs to!

We'll see how this shakes down I'm just thinking there's no way she can get away with that, it's so ridiculous and so out there!