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Iamwoman's Blog

Reasons to leave Domestic Violence

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It is common knowledge that many of us have been victims/survivors of domestic violence.

Do you remember what the point was, or what someone else said to you that finally convinced you that your abuser’s actions toward you are not ok, and that you should leave?

For me, it was my abuser showing a lack of disregard for my child that prompted me to leave (I don’t care what you do to me, but don’t mess with my kid). It was only after I left that I gained the self esteem necessary to not tolerate abuse from anyone anymore.

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Pass the tissues please

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I broke the cardinal rule of disengagement on the last skid weekend:

YSS said that he and OSS received flu shots earlier in the week. YSS seemed a little down in the dumps (slightly sick) so thinking that it was a reaction to the flu shot, and therefore non-communicable, I cared for him all weekend long. DH has his hands full with OSS who is failing school and constantly lying about homework).

No Birthday for You!

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Last weekend was our skid weekend (we are EOW), and we had plans to have a small lunch on the porch before giving YSS10 his birthday gifts. He just turned 10, and given the epic double-digit b-day bash I threw for DD when SHE turned 10 long ago, I figured HCBM would be throwing YSS10 a big soiree for his leap into double-digit-dom. DH and I send HCBM $1000/month for skids, so you would think a party and some presents would be in order, right?

Nope. Nope. Nope.

Just when you think you've heard it all...

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The horror of... Outside!

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I have mulled over this numerous times, and now I’m putting it in writing:

WHAT is it with skids having such intense hatred (or fear?) of being... outside?

Is it just MY skids, or are there others?

Last weekend, skids (who regularly choose to shut themselves in their tiny bedroom all weekend long - another topic altogether that I will never comprehend, seeing as being made to stay in my bedroom as a child for even an hour felt like unbearable torture), were roughhousing in their bedroom.

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Double trouble

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So now we find out that not only is OSS13 failing most of his classes in school, but YSS9 is also not doing well in school.

One of OSS13's teachers resembles me (except for her hair color), and she is the one he misbehaves the worst around. This is absolutely a direct result of PAS and all of the vile things his mother has made up about me over the years.

It is frustrating that both skids are bombing in school, but I know I'm in good company at STalk.

Here is my major concern (I worry about things that haven't happened yet, I know):

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“I’m so amazing!”

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...thinks angry OSS13.

As is DD, OSS13 is gifted. I thought the two of them would be neck and neck with grades and in competition with each other as to who becomes the most successful in life...

Buuut.... as stated in my previous blog, OSS13 is failing multiple classes and apparently has been for a couple of years.

Here’s the kicker: we found out this past weekend, that OSS13 isn’t upset at his failing grades... he is upset that he actually has to DO homework and classwork at all!!! 

Another skid fails at everything

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Okay - I'm joining the "my skid is failing in school" club here on STalk!

So, per the PAS handbook, DH has been blocked by HCBM for several years now from accessing OSS13's school grades.

NOW all of a sudden HCBM wants help from DH because WHAM: OSS13 is failing almost ALL of his classes, and has been for a few years now.

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Does Anyone's Kid/Skid Bring them Joy??

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My own DD and 2 Skids do not ever bring an ounce of joy into my or DH's lives.

If I am having a good day, there is always a good chance one of them will ruin it.

If I am having a bad day, they will 100% make it worse.

Never once - not a single solitary time - have either DD or skids attempted to try to cheer me up or help me out when I am having a bad day. Not once in their lives: 15, 13, and 9.

As a child, I was always a happy-go-lucky little girl. I literally skipped everywhere I went, and it was ridiculously difficult for anyone to bring my spirits down.

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