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Feeling bad for SD

I love dogs's picture

Submitted by I love dogs on Mon, 03/26/2018 - 7:11pm

This week is her spring break and she asked for this week to be her first "week on" with dad. All of her friends have plans. One of her friends should be free on Wednesday, but until then, she'll have to be by herself at our house with the dogs. GBM stays at BM's with the toddler but SD doesn't want to be there.

I had her go through her things today for donation so she was doing that when I left for work. Her laundry is folded and put away. Her friend lent her a book to read and she has her phone and laptop. She prefers to lounge and enjoy her time off. I don't trust her to walk the dogs alone. 

DH gets home between 6 and 8 at night but will try to be home asap this week to have dinner with her and watch movies. I'm going to encourage her going to youth group tomorrow to possibly make some new friends. DH may also teach her to play chess.

Anyway, maybe looking for suggestions for her to entertain herself in the afternoons? Just an update, really. When I was 12, I was always with my friends and I know that she doesn't like hanging out with us as much as she used to when she was younger.

Comments

lieutenant_dad's picture

Submitted by lieutenant_dad on Tue, 03/27/2018 - 7:40am

Is she complaining about being bored? Is she doing any chores during the day?

I spent many a summer and break not doing much of anything. I might have spent a few days with friends. I went to one summer camp once. We did occasional trips, but only for a weekend or week.

I think parents have started worrying too much about kids having "fun" over holidays from school. Kids can be creative and figure it out. I don't think you need to help her come up with anything unless she asks. Even then, I'd give her some chores to do throughout the day - laundry, dishes, vacuuming. She doesn't need to spend her whole day cleaning, but giving her one or two chores a day won't hurt.

lieutenant_dad's picture

Submitted by lieutenant_dad on Tue, 03/27/2018 - 7:40am

Is she complaining about being bored? Is she doing any chores during the day?

I spent many a summer and break not doing much of anything. I might have spent a few days with friends. I went to one summer camp once. We did occasional trips, but only for a weekend or week.

I think parents have started worrying too much about kids having "fun" over holidays from school. Kids can be creative and figure it out. I don't think you need to help her come up with anything unless she asks. Even then, I'd give her some chores to do throughout the day - laundry, dishes, vacuuming. She doesn't need to spend her whole day cleaning, but giving her one or two chores a day won't hurt.

hereiam's picture

Submitted by hereiam on Tue, 03/27/2018 - 8:30am

She's 12 years old, and I think you have said that she's smart, she will be fine and will figure out what to do with herself.

I loved being home alone at that age. I could sing at the top of my lungs, I could clean without everybody getting in my way, or I could just watch TV, if I wanted. But, I've always been very independent.

There is nothing wrong with her learning to be by herself... and liking it. It will be good for her to know that she doesn't have to be dependent on someone else to entertain her, or for her happiness.

beebeel's picture

Submitted by beebeel on Tue, 03/27/2018 - 8:48am

So many kids are bored today because their parents are running around trying to prevent them from ever feeling bored. Let her be bored! That's when creativity kicks in.