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BM texting DH

I love dogs's picture

DH came home early to make enchiladas for dinner with me. Yum! Anyway, he checks his phone and said he got a message from BM asking if they can have a "civil conversation". 

I quickly told him to RECORD any phone convos or only email and text. He knows that she will not see his side so it's pretty much going to be a lost cause either way. She sees him as a paycheck, always has, always will.

He said if anything, he'll tell her to go to his shop to talk in person. He knows she can't be big and bad to his face but I told him to NOT FORGET TO RECORD EVERY WORD SAID!

Comments

I love dogs's picture

No kidding. I bet the wench is livid he hasn't text her back yet. Oh well, she can brew on it until tomorrow or Monday.

tankh21's picture

LOL, BM texting to have a "civil conversation" aka BM just wants attention or needs a punching bag.

I love dogs's picture

I'm thinking she wants him to put the shocks she bought on the SUV he gave her that he refused to do last week. I told him heck no, techno!

LittleBoPeep's picture

I can't wait to hear what this conversation is about.  My guess is it's something she knows is going to piss him off and that's why she wants it to be "civil" lol

How were the enchiladas? Biggrin

I love dogs's picture

I'm afraid of that, too. I told him to stand his ground and record everything if he does talk to her. Or ignore her until Monday to let her brew on it haha

They were great! Nice and spicy. Next time, we're going to use blue corn tortillas and they'll be perfect.

Mrs Fireball's picture

Too funny. She's twisting it to make it sound like he's the unreasonable one. Narcs do that when they're called out on their BS. 

I love dogs's picture

Oh, yes. Her twisted mind will try to justify to him that he still owes his monthly payment ON TOP of a 50/50 obligation. It's "for her future" as she kept telling him. Even if he did keep paying her and putting it toward SD's college, dad will never get any credit for it.

I love dogs's picture

I hope he tells her that but honestly I think he has no business talking to her if it isn't legally binding which would eliminate meditation. However, the meditator always sided with DH and BM just turned on the water works and nothing was ever resolved. That's why I know that the two of them having a "civil conversation" is just a waste of breath and she won't even consider his side.

justmakingthebest's picture

He needs a witness to the conversation at the very least. So if it is at his shop and he knows someone that would testify if needed it would be something. 

I love enchiladas! Especailly since I got my instant pot and can make the shredded chicken all seasoned and delicious in like 15 mins! LOL 

I love dogs's picture

I told him this so we'll see if he listens. He knows how manipulative she is so he needs to do things right.

I have an instapot but have only used it for rice. Do you use tomatoes and chiles?

twoviewpoints's picture

IDK, maybe offer BM the chance for mediation if she wants to 'talk'. 

IMO, what she is about to try is to play Daddy for the fool and keep 50/50 off legal court papers and keep the CS coming. If hes serious this time about tired of being the inferior parent at BM's whim, who changes her mind and pulls out all her control cards when her daughter gets her little fee-fees hurt or gets in deep doo with Daddy (Mommy races to save SD) , he best stand his ground. 

There's mediation, lawyer to lawyer negotiations or nothing. 

I love dogs's picture

I did tell him this after he left and I read your post this morning but he hasn't said anything back to me yet. She will most definitely try to convince him that he still needs to "support" their daughter even though he's taking on half of the load now and so SHE can pay all of the bills and "hold it over his head" as he keeps saying.

Also, I'm kinda thinking she may tell him she wants to move out of state and take SD (they were just vacationing in the city where SF's brother lives and she's talked about moving there before) or that "SD" decided she doesn't want to do 50/50 anymore which would be so convenient. Maybe I'm wrong and she wants to be "civil" but I doubt it 3000%.

I love dogs's picture

Hahaha pretty much! In her defense, she can have a calm convo IF the other party agrees with every delusional word she says. If not, the yelling and crocodile tears start. It's quite pathetic and DH won't tolerate. What grown woman is so emotional she can't have a disagreement without crying?

thinkthrice's picture

the same way.  If you agree to everything she says and simply reply "yes, ma'am" then she's ok, otherwise the screaming and inevitable hang up happens.

Don't forget the "fetal crouch" as though cowering in fear (pretty tough to do for a 6' tall woman) and the patented Girhippo "hand in front of the face" so she can't see her adversaries when speaking (Chef and me)

I love dogs's picture

I am surprised that such "independent" women don't have a little more pride than that. Yes, I sometimes cry in emotional situations, but as a defense mechanism to knowing I'm wrong? Nope, I have too much self respect.

I love dogs's picture

DH called her a GU without using that term. It made me so proud haha it's just a control tactic so that SHE can take all of the parental credit and push him out. She's always operated that way. She claims it's going into SD's college account then cries poor for SD's RIGHT NOW expenses but is going on yearly vacations, sometimes two, and getting laser hair removal.

ProbablyAlreadyInsane's picture

"Why of course we can BM. In court mediation when we settle the legalities of 50/50 custody!"

I love dogs's picture

I wish meditation was an option. I'm sure she'll agree to it to make herself look good then decline every reasonable offer and they're back to square one. Too bad it isn't documented- which I think is bull. She'll also probably claim that he's "harassing" her. Yes, this BM plays the victim to a T.

ProbablyAlreadyInsane's picture

So does ours... Judge said mediate. She refused. Walked into the room with our lawyer. Said "they just keep the kids from me!!!!" (after abandoning for a year) then walked out. Wouldn't even discuss with our lawyer. The b****.

I love dogs's picture

Did refusing mediation make her look her look "hostile" as far as you observed? DH said he thinks speaking to her without a third party is dangerous and I'm so happy he feels that way. 

Before they went to court 5 or 6 years ago, they used her parents as mediators. They agreed that DH deserved to be an equal parent. They love DH. Naturally, she started screaming, crying, and left. Nothing was accomplished because the woman child didn't get her way. Well, sadly she did in court because our state treated DH like scum and gave her everything she wanted.. I hope DH's attorney is worth a damn like he claims. Apparently he's very powerful.

ProbablyAlreadyInsane's picture

Apparently not... Because she's a master manipulator who was trying to manipulate the judge... And he bought at least some of it... But we did pretty good for a BM loving state... And now it's relaly just a waiting game based on her history...