Update - Sleeping Arrangements for SS15
So my DH has "decided" that he is taking both LOs away this weekend to visit the inlaws, and leaving me home alone. He was originally supposed to go with the skids. Now he says all of them are going. He didn't care that I have no interest in going since we were JUST there for Thanksgiving (4 hour drive each way), and that I have to work both Friday and Monday. He didn't care that I was looking forward to the time at home with the kids and festive plans we made. He's making a decision unilaterally, which is not going to work for me.
And what's worse is that he planned on having DS4 sleep in the same room as SS15! We had a huge fight over this. He told me to "just get over" SS15. And that I am welcome to come but that he's going with the kids and "that's that".
I am shocked that I didn't lose my you-know-what enitrely. I responded that his judgment is frightening regarding SS15, and that its pretty awful for him to just take off last minute with our shared children the weekend before Christmas.
This is going to get ugly. I called back the detective who worked on our case (regarding DH's plan to let the boys sleep in the same room), and the first lawyer that I spoke with.
I was trying to stay in this situation until my Bios were older and could advocate for themselves. But if DH is going to attempt to leave like this, without getting my concurrence as the other parent... I don't see the point in staying. Despite everything that's happened, I have never, ever taken off with our bios. I've only gone away once with our bios alone, and that was to see my ailing grandparents - a trip that I asked DH to approve, that he was invited on, and that worked with his schedule. He was going to come but bailed last minute.
You all have given excellent advice. I don't know that there is much more I can do than to get those ducks aligned.