Another day...I just get so tired of the skids being on another level than my kids. Quick run down...My bio kids are 21 and 25. Skids are 19 and 16. As long as I've been with DH, he's considered my kids SO much older than his. Yes, my older one is, but not a ton of age difference between my younger and his older. Now, I've always noticed how him and BM treat their kids and they have always babied the skids...so much to the fact that they are immature for their ages. Always have been, for years! I can remember the day my DD turned 18. DH went on and on about how she's an adult now.
Once again the dreaded mother’s day Is coming up. I’m the mom that doesn’t get recognized. Every now and again mg kids will surprise me but it’s usually more not than so. This weekend is my daughter’s graduation so I know mother’s day Won’t be on her mind. I drove 9 hours to see her this weekend. DH starts rubbing it in in the car. I feel like he tries to get me upset with my kids. He goes on and on about how they probably won’t remember mother’s day Funny thing is, I’m sure DH hasn’t even gotten me a card either.
So if you've followed my story, I am disengaged for so many reasons. I can't seem to do or say anything right in the presence of the skids. DH always watches to critique me after I am around them. It is really horrible. Anyway, he picks them both up (ages 16 and 19) weekly and takes them to dinner. I may be around them once a month or every other month. As far as my Facebook, when we first got together, DH asked me to block BM and befriend the kids because BM would look at our business and if we went on a trip or did anything fun, she would start demanding more money.
SD had asked DH to move in with us this summer. I told him that was a bad idea.I told DH my feelings on everything. I have never been allowed to "parent" the skids when they are over...down to asking them to pick up a dish so I know this would be bad. SD19 does NOT like to work. She is a lazy child. He sort of "tabled" it for now. I literally haven't even been around SD19 until this weekend. We picked her up to hand out with us. It ended up being a disaster for me. First of all, we are hoping to move in the near future to another state.
I haven't posted in awhile well because....things have been going really great. Honestly, the step kiddos are growing up and not coming around much to reak havoc on the old marriage. DH takes them to dinner every week without me and that's ok with me. No fights, no nothing for us! The only thing we really would fight about is the stepkids!!! Well, after dinner this past week, DH tells me that SD19 wants to move in with us. What?!? Now if anyone has followed my blogs, this would not be good for my marriage. First of all, SD19 is not a go getter.
I'm bothered...part of me wonders if I should be bothered or am I just over reacting, like my jealousy or claws coming out. DH is still very good friends with a guy that WAS married to ex wife's cousin. Of course because of this, when they talk or get together, a lot of the conversation is about that family, which I'm about tired of anyway. Today, ex wife, BM, calls DH to basically gossip and fill him in on some fights with his guy friend and his ex (BM's cousin.) She's wanting to know if he knows all this is going on, etc. They talked for about 15 minutes.
If you have been following my blog, you know what I have been dealing with. I knew deep down in my heart that DH would never believe what act his precious Soon to be 19 year old puts on. This past week has been a hard one for us. I had a serious health scare. I don’t want to go into too much detail just to keep my privacy on here in case he ever found this page. But anyway, it was serious, yes I could have died and I’ve been laid up. Many friends have been checking on me, etc. Neigher SD has even bothered to send a text like hope you’re feeling better or any.
We all know that our DH's are totally different towards his kids and I find even his friends he had before he met me. I feel like he's very protective of any of them. I can hardly say anything about a skid or even one of his friends without him jumping to their defense. Now with me, my kids, my family...it's the total opposite. He never has a problem saying what he truly thinks. Today I told him something that happened to a family member. My family member was beat up on, at college. He immediately started making fun of them. LOL...he was beat up by a drunk person! HAHA. He went on and on.
So after hearing DH talk to his ex last night, things even started to bother me more. They are planning on meeting for breakfast or at a food place next weekend with SD to talk to her about what's going on with her. It's eating at me. SD is 18. Why should DH have to go sit with BM and SD to have talks? I told him this morning that it was bothering me. I woke up with a migraine from the stress of it. I tried to talk rationally and explain how it made me feel. It's not my daughter....I'm insecure....I'm always causing issues....blah, blah, blah was his answers.
As of today, DH talked to SD and she is supposed to be moving in the with the grandparents. I'm assuming it's because both the parents are telling her she needs to get a job and they will dote on her. DH is still insistent that he will sit down with BM and SD to discuss things in two weeks when she's home. At this point, I don't even know what there is to discuss since she's made all of her decisions. I am breathing a lot easier, but still have my guard up. I don't think she will be successful because she has no idea what she wants to do...and she is not a hard worker or go getter.