Dtzybld came right out in her last blog that Sm's get the blame for everything. I applaud you girl! Yes we do get the short end of the stick. Here's what I have to say:

I am a BIOMOM of three and a STEPMOM of two. Full time with both sets and a DH who although is a wonderful man, buries his head and constantly excuses Skids behavior along with MIL and BM. I had enough and this is how I feel about that....

I love you DH. With all my heart and soul. When I love someone I give everything I have. I don't do it recklessly, I don't do it impulsively, I often fight myself for the feelings I have (like I did with you for five months). I have given YOUR children every opportunity I have given MY children, because I loved you and therefore loved them as a part of you. I expected the dame from them as my bios, but I also hoped for, wanted and did everything I could to give them every chance and opportunity that my bios got, for what? To be treated like nothing, to have the family I tried to encourage, to have the way I feel be spit on by not just skids, but MIL, BM, AND you!!!

For those who say "you married the package" or "are you really comparing your 'perfect' kids to his", or those that day stepmoms are evil...I say SCREW YOU!

Bio or not, bred from one set of parents or blended from two sets, some fundamentals DO NOT CHANGE! Divorced or not divorced parents should be teaching kids at minimum these things. Those are:
1- when you do wrong you admit it, you apologize, you make it right.
2- There is such a thing as RIGHT and WRONG. learn it. Know it. And make it better if you make the wrong choice.
3- your character is the best and most honorable thing you will carry with you for your life. Make sure you have strong character. Have morals. Be the kind of person that people know where they stand with you, know where you stand on an issue, and know you are being HONEST and steadfast to your beliefs.
4- no one OWES you anything! Whether you come from a 'perfect' family, divorced family, a dysfunctional family, or no family....YOU and ONLY YOU have the ability to create the life you want.
5- everyone older than you deserves RESPECT. It doesn't mean you have to agree with what they say or feel, but it does mean you at least hear them out, state your side, and pursue on with your life if what you are standing up for is honest, true and trustworthy.
6- if you are not supporting yourself, then the people who are supporting you, BD, BM, SD, SM and anyone else deserves to be treated with dignity and told thank you and know your appreciation for them making sure you have what you need to get through this life.
7- if people talk poorly or make up lies about people you know truly (whether to be a friend, a parent, a step or a sibling), stand up for them...no matter who is talking poorly of them
8- remember that you would not have gotten as far as you have without each person in your life who helped you along the way. Give them the appreciation they deserve.
9- never intentionally try to hurt anyone, but especially those who love you, and CHOOSE to have you in their lives
10- work hard. Give your best. It may not always be enough, but when you walk away ffrom whatever it is (a relationship, a job, etc) you will at least be able to hold your head high and say,"I gave it my best shot".

As for all those who have been coming here to say we are EVIL step-parents, or those just trolling I say this to you....
Most of us honestly started out wanting the best for the children of the person we love. For some of us, the person we chose to marry. They are a part of the person we don't want to have to live without. A part of the person who brings something into our lives that no one else can. Many of us stopped caring and doing as a self preservation mechanism. To protect ourselves not just from the rude, inconsiderate or down right abusive behaviors of those people who are a part of our partners, but from the bio parents who can't step back and say...well look...there is one more (and it's often much more than one person, I.e. Extended families, step siblings, etc) person who loves my child. Who wants the best for my child. Not because they HAVE to, but because they CHOOSE to. Accept this OP, accept this and relish it, because there are in fact people who are not good to children...your kids are lucky enough to have someone who cares. Again, not because they HAVE to, but because they CHOOSE to. And when you intentionally alienate your children from them, don't expect them to just say, "oh well" and sure I'll cover YOUR child's activities, needs, and wants. I don't think there is a single one of us on here that went in to our relationships with the promise and hope of things being much different then They are now. To say, " WHY should skid have to change HIS/HER routine and behavior because you walked in...well the answer so because I AM THE ADULT IN THE HOUSE, I MAKE THE MONEY, THEREFORE I SET THE RULES. IF YOU DONT WANT OR NEED ANYTHING FROM ME, THEN DONT CALL, TEXT, ETC ( this goes for both adults and minor skids)

And finally, DH...no one is telling you that you failed...simply trying to help you succeed more, understand more, and force son into a regimen that would teach him many more lessons than either of us could.

So dtzybld...thank you for promoting my vent. Thanks to those who read it also.