DH...bang head on wall....bang head on wall ...expect different results
SD has gone off the same cliff as the GWR did about 3 years ago. School work is just not important. Turn in work..study..pffffft..that is just not important or necessary. Needless to say, SD's grades have tanked. DH is now frustrated/pissed/disappointed and embarrassed.
DH's solve for this is to HOUND Sd to turn things in and to study. When I say HOUND I mean he is relentless. This is NOT working in the least. It is now background noise to SD and she just tell DH whatever will get him off her back. Dh....hound...SD lie....DH hound..SD lie/deflect...rinse and repeat. Nothing changes...except I have a headache.
I finally have had enough of listening to this vicious circle. I sat DH down and told him.
Let SD fail. Stop hounding her. She isn't listening and just placating you with whatever she thinks will stop you from talking. Let her fail and suffer the natural consquences. It will be painfull for you to watch...but you need to let her do this. Your method is just not working. Tell her once she is missing assigments or that she needs to study and then stop. No continued hounding. Also no sit down with SD to tell her what you expect of her. She already knows what you expect and just doesn't give a rip. Once again..just noise to her. You have also reviewed with her what she will need to get into the college she wants. She already knows...whether or not she works for that..that is up to her. YOU DH CANNOT care more than she does.
The natural consquences could be (mostly likely will be)
1. She fails her classes. Tell SD we tried it her way and look where we are. What does she think she needs to do to change things or is she ok with not graduating?
2. When she asked for her permit/license here soon. The answer will be no. Since she isn't responsible enough to turn in work and get decent grades..the she isn't responsible enough for a driver permit/license or a car. Sorry SD....either get it together or wait till your 18.
3. SD doesn't get into the college she wants to go to. SD will have to figure out other plans.
4. If SD decides to go to community college she will pay up front for it. If she gets decent grades, you can reimburse her. That way if she flakes off and fails...then its her money not yours. If she doesn't, she gets her college paid for.
DH understands..but honestly its so hard for him TO JUST SHUT UP. Seriously, he wants to WIN and force SD to do something. At 15 and half...she is beyond that at this point.
SD also has no real currency for us to take away. She has a phone..but if we take that Beaver will just buy her a new one as we have seen with GWR. Beaver will also use that as way to say that DH IS SOOO MEAN AND THEY TOLD HER HE WOULD TURN ON HER. then we will have the three way trama bond between Beaver, GWR and SD. Oh joy. Same goes with ipad/etc SD doesn't do any hobbies or any sports or anything really. So...not much that we have to work with. So...best bet is natural consequences.
Buckle up..its going to be a bumpy ride.