dh and i talked today. he came and apologized for the things he said. that he was sorry that i had gone through all of this for years, that he knew he had really f*cked things up. he said he was very very wrong and said he would not blame me at all if i left him, after all of these years of drama. that he cant fix everything but he can try to make things right.

the school called him today and ss17 pretty much had a breakdown. he confessed to that he's been drinking alcohol and smoking pot for years, and the reason he's never had a girlfriend is because he is gay. and has been pretty reckless in that department too. dh was totally unaware of all of this and kept saying "i put my trust in this kid, and he does all of this? wtf?"

he got that phone call today, yesterday sd20 called him and screamed at him for being a horrible father, called him all kinds of names and hung up on him. he is seeing his children for what they are. he is seeing guilty parenting for what it does. ss17 said he is ready to apologize to me and come back into our house. dh told him no. he was safe where he was, he can stay there until WE are ready to have him back. i dont know if thats legal or not (he turns 18 in four weeks), but i dont really care. my empathy for these kids has run out. i'm just glad that dh is starting to see things for what they truly are.