I like my stepchild less and less
I feel awful typing that into the Title field. But it’s the truth.
I have been in my stepchild’s life since she was 4 years old. Her mother abandoned her and moved out of state when was a year old. My husband was never married to her. It was a “young and dumb, let’s party together, oops! I’m pregnant” situation. My stepchild was very ready to have a mom when her father and I started dating and we bonded quickly. She called me “mommy” two weeks after we moved in together. We were shocked but you could tell that she was really happy.
Her mother temporarily moved back with her other child while her other child’s father finished out a prison sentence in their state. We began sharing custody. The judge granted her visitation two days a week. That lasted about a year. My stepchild would come back home acting different at times, but it didn’t disrupt our bond at all.
Her mother moved back as soon as her other child’s father was released from prison. Now she only sees my stepchild 3-5 times per year (depending on when she actually exercises her visitation time).
The older my stepchild gets, the more she gets under my skin. She went from a little girl with empathy and kindness to a little girl who is completely self-centered and fake. I have been around a lot of kids, and she is the only one I have ever seen who has so many different faces for different people. She is manipulative and she completely takes advantage of people. She is over the top dramatic and she is constantly putting on a show. I have practically raised her so I see through all of the acting. My husband is aware of it (even made a comment the other day that she is becoming a “narcissist like her mother”) but doesn’t see it as a serious problem. I do. And I cannot stand the person that she is becoming as she gets older. This summer was the first time that I was actually EXCITED for her to go out of state to visit her bio mom. The more she gets under my skin, the more cold I am towards my husband (I know, that’s really messed up - but I truly cannot help the way that I feel. I am just trying to find a better way of dealing with those feelings and reacting to them).
Has anyone else ever felt the same way? Or been in a similar situation?