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I am going to be Homeless

Goodstepmom's picture

So I am going to be homeless, yes, isn't that great.

Dh and I got into an argument, and he told me to get the f out... isn't that great. Since I don't work, I don't have any money, No car or friends or family to go too.

So since this is not a domestic violence situation and I don't have children, I can't go to an woman's shelter.

So I would have to go to an homeless shelter right? I am not sure, also there are no buses running right now, so I would have to walk and I don't know where to go.

And I probably can't take my stuff with me but then how would I carry it anyway.
Does anybody know where I should go??

This is fucking great. I think I am going to throw up.


Totalybogus's picture

I wouldn't leave the house. If he wants to be away from you so bad, let him leave. How long have you been married?

Goodstepmom's picture

Well since he is paying the rent, I have no right to be here, so he says.

We have been married for 3 years.

I came to the US because he begged me too, I was in college when we met, had my own apartment and my own money.

He begged me to come to the us, I have no family here, I can't call anybody right now, I tried and because of the time difference nobody is answering.

Now because we had an arguments he tells me to leave. Leave right now.
He thinks I am online talking to my family to make arrangements to leave.

on the fence's picture

What a jackass! I know you would probably love to oblige him, but he is being a douche! Stay in your house and make him leave. I'd be looking for a job right away!

Goodstepmom's picture

As of right now I can't work, I have to wait for all my documents from the immigration office to come back first. So I am stuck and he knows this.

I feel so sick. :sick:

ddakan's picture

Excuse me, I don't fucking care if you don't work. He is married to you and should treat you like family!

OMG Woman!!! That man is being an asshole, 2 days before Christmas. Uh first, you don't have to leave because its your house too! Second, if he wants to be rid of you so bad he can earn his way out of it by working toward a healthy transition for you to where ever you want to go.

This is bullshit! Stand up to him and tell him it is ridiculous for him to expect you to leave. If you want to get a job and continue college, great. he can help you plan that out....responsibly!!!! You don't just kick someone to the curb when you're done with them. We are people, NOT DOGS.

Hang in there!!!!!

StepDeux's picture

He can't make you leave. Stay where you are! Just because you don't pay rent doesn't mean you're not a legal tenant. I'm sure if he were to call the cops, they would tell him the same thing.

Also, I do think that you can go to a women's shelter. Being told to "get the f--- out" knowing you don't have anywhere to go is emotional abuse - especially if he's done this to you before. If you haven't contacted one, I would urge to you call them and see what they say, just so that you have another option should things escalate with your DH.

buttercookie's picture

Don't leave! You live there and he can't just kick you out. Call the police if he gets violent.

MamaBecky's picture

Unless you are being physically abused don't leave. I don't know what state you are in...but in some if you leave then you are abandoning the home and can then forego custody of any of your property. If he wants to be away from you bad enough he will leave. If divorce is in your future let the courts decide who goes where and who gets what. If he is being physical and you feel you have to leave for safety reasons be sure to file charges on him on your way through town! I'm sorry this is happening in your life.

lorrieart's picture

DO NOT LEAVE - Stay put. I'm Canadian so I don't know the laws in the US, but just stay where you are. Get your life in order while you have a roof over your head. Try social assistance for now. Go back to school...there must be some resources that are available to you. What a jerk!

jenstep's picture

I hope you didn't leave. Even if he is the only one on the lease if you have lived there for more than a few weeks then you have established legal residence there. He would have to go through a long process of eviction for you to leave. If things end up working out between you two please start finding a way to "skim" some money off the top and start saving. You don't want to be unprepared the next time this happens.

Goodstepmom's picture

I told him yesterday, that I am not going anywhere and if he wants me out he has to call the police, then I told him he has to sleep on the couch and that is where he has been since then, we are still not talking to each other. I told him yesterday that he is letting his anger out on me, bm, mil and ss piss him off but he lets it out on me. Not cool. He is not physically Violent or anything, he just has a big mouth.

I am sick and tired of fighting, why doesn't he go and yell at bm and mil.

anita...sigh's picture

Glad to hear you stayed put. Men are so bad at taking things out on their spouses when things go bad.

Keep us posted please! I've been worried about you. You have allies on your side on this site and are willing to help you.

Good for you for making DH sleep on couch and double good for you telling him he's taking his anger at BM et al out on you. Maybe he will stew and think about it for a bit.

Best of luck to you. You sound like a strong woman.

Butterflykissesandlicks's picture

"I am sick and tired of fighting, why doesn't he go and yell at bm and mil."

This. Exactly what he should do.

Stay Strong.