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Are Ann's Rose-Colored Glasses Slipping?

GhostWhoCooksDinner's picture

Ann and I met for dinner last night, and I think she finally may be slipping into reality. At least a little. Knowing Ann, she's still going to do exactly what she set out to do, but I think some realizations are setting in. I'll try to keep this as short as possible but, boy, she let loose quite a bit last night.

First, she talked about how her son, Chris, has seemed kind of quiet and withdrawn and hasn't been talking to her openly like he always has. I tried to get her to think about what's going on in Chris' life. It's always been just the two of them, as long as he can remember, Now he's been thrust into a "new family" where there's a man and two other kids, they're together all the time, spending the night at Tom's house, going on vacations together. It's probably hard for him. It's a huge change. "Oh, well, he LOVES Tom, and the kids are going to be his brother and sister." How can he LOVE Tom? He's known him about four months. And these kids are NOT going to be his brother and sister; they MAY be his step-siblings, and there's a HUGE difference. Think about it, Ann. And while you're at it, think about this too- all you ever talk about anymore is Sailor Talk Mary and once in a while, her brother. You never talk about your own kid anymore. She really didn't have a response to that, but the wheels were turning.

Stop shoving this "new family" down your kid's throat! She's utterly convinced that her son will never want to live with his dad because they're not close, but this will send him running in a few years.

Next, she talked about an incident that happened over the weekend. She and Hottie were upstairs doing...whatever while the kids were downstairs playing. Sailor Talk Mary pounded up the stairs, pounded on the door, and yelled, "Those guys are being TOTAL ASSHOLES down there!" Did Hottie address his snowflake's language? C'mon, you know the answer! So they went downstairs, and Chris said that Mary had kicked him in the shin because the boys were "ganging up on her." He now has a fist-sized bruise on his shin. Was this addressed. Yes! You bet! Hottie gave his daughter a "talking to" and sent her to her room for FIFTEEN MINUTES. Bet she never acts out again! And Ann wonders why her son is withdrawn?

THEN...bear with me, Ann had a lot to say last night...Ann was talking about how she is always taking Tom's kids here and there, she goes to all their soccer games, she does things for them and buys them stuff, but Tom has never once asked to go to one of Chris' sporting events. He's never offered to spend one-on-one time with him, nada. "isn't that a bit one-sided?" she asked. Duh, you think so? If he's not making as effort NOW, in the beginning stages of the relationship, you know, when he's supposed to be impressing you, what makes you think that's going to change? Hello, Hottie can't parent his OWN kids. What makes you think he wants to take on someone else's? What do you think you're around for, NANNY? Also, Hottie has only been to Ann's house THREE times. Yeah, that's a bit one-sided.

And finally, she dropped the little nugget that Hottie HAS NOT HAD A JOB for the past eight months! How he's paying for his house and feeding his kids, I don't know, but this is a guy who (supposedly) has an MBA and (supposedly) has worked high-level jobs in respectable corporations. He's "holding out for the one position at the one company he really thinks he deserves." :O :O :O

Sounds to me like he's super lazy parent and narcissist who wants a nanny and a woman to support him.

Ann's got some thinking to do, but I know Ann. She's going to do what she's going to do. She's not using birth control, and if she wants THAT to be the father of her next kid, so be it.

To be continued, I'm sure....


GhostWhoCooksDinner's picture

His dad lives two hours away and sees him maybe three or four times a year. He left before Chris was a year old. I feel bad for the poor kid. He's so sweet.

GhostWhoCooksDinner's picture

Chris too is definitely an introvert. He loves being with other kids, but he needs his alone time too. Sailor Mary and he are the same age, and she won't leave him alone for five minutes. And she's, well, brash. The younger boy, who's 8, he gets along with better because he also seems pretty laid back.

ChiefGrownup's picture

Not using birth control.

Boyfriend super stud not employed.

He wants a job he "deserves."

No interest in her kid.

Sailor Mouth Mary. 'Nuff said right there.

Her kid with a big bruise.

O.M.G. :jawdrop:

Aniki's picture

I hope Ann sees the light before Sailor Mouth Mary accuses her son of something.


ChiefGrownup's picture

Well, I know him well enough right now that I would never go on even a coffee date with him let alone sleep with him! }:)

AshMar654's picture

Not consistently. I hope they are using other methods of preventing. I will admit that I am not on any birth control have not been for two plus years. I took myself off because I was having issues on it with my mood swings. Ever since I went off been so much better, maybe that is why she does not really use it. I will say my SO and I have been together for over a year and we use other ways to prevent me from getting knocked up.

She is not smart at all. Why is it lately that I keep seeing, hearing, and reading about smart well-educated women who have their lives together accidentally get pregnant. My SO and I had a few "Oh shit" moments off to the pharmacy I went to. Are women that desperate these day? There is so much out there these days to help people plan and be smart, why does everyone ignore it. I get thing feel better without the raincoat but is it really worth the next 18 years of dealing with someone who barely know and will most likely end up hating?

GhostWhoCooksDinner's picture

This will be Ann's future if she continues to keep the blinders on and ignore the GIANT red flags that are waving right in front of her face...

Knocked up, moving in with Hottie, paying all the bills herself, raising his two kids FT because BM left, and seeing Chris once a month after he goes to live with Dad. Fun times.

AshMar654's picture

I totally agree with you on this. I still have the rose glasses a little too since I am new to all this but damn if my SO did not have a job when I met him no way in hell I would have even kept seeing him. That is a huge turn off for me. Even if the buy was good in bed I would just use him as a booty call.

I have a friend in a situation who is dating a total loser. She has two degrees and he does not even have a GED. He goes from job to job and is not a nice person or anything. Her self esteem has never been that high and this is the first guy that ever showed her any interest. I can tell you he brings her down all the time, all I can say thank god there is no kids in that situation. I just to not understand these days when women are so empowered to be in control of their lives they get into this and just lose it all.

GhostWhoCooksDinner's picture

Right? The whole time she's been dating Hottie, she's never bothered to mention that he doesn't actually WORK. I never even imagined her going for a guy like that. The sex must be mind-blowing, that's all I can say. I see no other positives to this situation.

robin333's picture

I said this in one of the first post about Ann. Hopefully, she will realize the impact before it happens.

I feel sorry for Chris.

Simpleton21's picture

Holy wow, Nanny Ann is setting herself up for a lifetime of misery, OMG!!! I now understand why the BM is so cordial with Nanny Ann...she's dumping her oldest, biggest child off on her and Ann thinks she is winning!!!!

Hottie Tom is just looking for his newest caregiver and of course not interested in her son at all!

You know that she hasn't told you about his lack of a job until now for a reason. She knows how ridiculous it is for him to not have a job for that long!

I do feel bad for Chris. I hope he does move in with his dad and maybe open's Nanny Ann's eyes a little!

GhostWhoCooksDinner's picture

That explains why BM just sat there and said nothing at the soccer game when Ann got on Mary for being a little ass. Ann's getting a POS for a boyfriend! And she's probably glad that at least someone's taking care of her kids the 50% they're with their sperm donor.

ChiefGrownup's picture

Yeah, it does explain the BM's attitude. She is lighting a candle every night that her ex sinks his hooks into this woman so her kids will have some kind of care on dad's time and she, ex, and their kids will have another revenue stream to drain off. Yup.

CLove's picture

I was wondering about BM too, and HER motivations for being so nice. Apparently you hit the nail on the head, because with that Mr Hottie, shes not getting money from him. How DOES he support himself? That is the question? I wonder if BM ended up paying HIM alimony and HIM child support? Or he has some savings and is just waiting it out to see where the relationship goes.

Definitely BM is happy if Ann hooks up with her ex permanently. She gets nanny with extra money!!!

My BM does not recognize my contributions to her children AT ALL, but I got her BF a job, and paid for many gifts over the years.

GhostWhoCooksDinner's picture

I have NO idea how he's living if he's not working. And neither of them pays child support due to their 50/50 arrangement. BM comes from money, so she can easily support herself. Hmmm...I wonder if all these "family" vacations Tom and Ann have been taking their kids on is coming form BM's trust fund? Ann makes really good money, so yeah, having her around is an extra income stream.

Simpleton21's picture

I'm beginning to think that Nanny Ann is funding the "family" vacations. Hot Tom hasn't been working on finding a job b/c he has been working on finding a new Sugar Momma! Ex BM came from he is dating Nanny Ann who is financially independent....hmmmmmm.....

Maxwell09's picture

Ugh I don't care how "hottie" Tom is...a grown man going voluntarily without a job is the most unattractive thing and I could never bring myself to date someone who's been unemployed "waiting for the right company" Ann is being hustled and the Ex is about to Win big.

FieryEscape's picture

If my SOs kid kicked my kid hard enough to leave a bruise like that , there would be a big family meeting and the behavior would be addressed.

Anne is getting sucked into blended hell..this man seems like a total user and a loser.

hereiam's picture

On top of everything else, Hot Tom is unemployed, too?

Let's hope Ann wakes up, before she gets knocked up.