BM fails to coparent
Yet again we have an instance of BM failing to do the bare minimum to coparent. Oldest is in scouts and fees for summer camp are coming out which means the dates have finally been set. They are going SOs court ordered time. She never once told us the dates and has already started making payments. Now SO could be a d*ck and say too bad she can't go but the thing is we really aren't against being flexible because we know camp is good for the kid. We know she wants to go and we support it. All we asked was that we were told the dates.
We are willing to be adjustable but she'll wait till the last minute then cry about him being a bad dad when she doesn't get every tiny thing she wants at the same time both kids have started to express they want more time with dad because they see where the conflict is.
BM bad mouths dad every disagreement. We say there was a breakdown in communication that is neither parents fault. BM says dad won't let you do this or that when we already have plans that the kids are well informed of so sorry they won't be at the last minute shotgun wedding for some distant family member.
As long as over all SO gets his time and we have time to plan it we're fine being adjustable and BM acts like he's evil for it. He gets 35% of the year so yes he's going to ensure he gets it. It's even more important now because both kids (12 and 9) have made it clear they want more time to the point the youngest last night flat out said he didn't want to go back to mom's. She gets mad because he gets larger clumps but he's offered to go back and adjust it to week on week off but that would mean equal time across the board and her losing control so nope she won't willingly do it.
We're saving up for a retainer for a lawyer but it's going to take while.