OT: Update and new challenge
I recently returned to my house/town after a long stay with my SO. We had a lovely 2+ weeks together, went on a 6 day bikepacking trip that put over 200 miles on my bike. Our typical mileage was 30-50 miles per day with a couple short days to rest. We saw plenty of wild life (rattlesnake crossing the trail) and so many wild flowers. We camped 2 nights and stayed in B&Bs or Airbnb's the other 4 nights. It was very civilized and the weather was dry and warm - we had a drop of two of rain, but nothing to interfere with our trip. If we could have ordered up the perfect weather, it couldn't have been better. We had a total of two flat tires - one each. Other than that, there were only minor difficulties and I had a little chafing/discomfort that may require a upgrade to my bike seat.
The rest of my visit, I worked remotely and we enjoyed a nice mundane routine. I took a couple days off prior to the holiday weekend and we got in some regular bike rides and did a LOT of gardening. There is a bay window at the mountain house that looks out on the side yard (which is like everyone else's backyard). The view right outside the window was of a little hill that was kind of barren with some weeds and dirt. I undertook the effort to transform it by adding an elderberry bush, some daisies, coral bells and another plant I can't remember the name of. I also moved some hosta lilies into the gaps (while the perennials fill in), and I added a hydrangea (love those), added a spirea, and moved a peony bush from out of the shade and into the sunlight of the garden. Then I mulched it and added only one annual: Lantana. It turned out really beautifully and it's such a pleasure to look at from many angles in the house and yard. SO got inspired and we got several more plants on our next outing: viburnum, lavender, butterfly bush, etc. A lot of what we planted is intended to attract pollinators to the vegetable garden.
We really had a lovely time together, but the next month is going to be a challenge. I think I'm up for it because I feel very secure in our relationship and the last couple weeks did a lot to solidify that. I was made to feel like it was my home, too. I felt very comfortable and very much included in his life up there. I've joined his cycling group and he's made it very apparent to all concerned that we are a couple and whenever he speaks about the subject wherever we go, he says "we bought a house" or "we moved here."
The next month is going to be a challenge because he's leaving soon to drive cross country for a cycling event in the Rockies. He has to get there well in advance to adjust to the altitude. It's a multi day and difficult event. On either side of his trip, he'll be spending time with a childhood friend, hiking and riding, and having a blast.
I'm so happy for him and it's honestly a very attractive thing to be with someone who has the means and inclination to go on exciting and challenging adventures. I've never been with someone like that. XH1 was (and seems still is) very clingy and needy. I would have LOVED it if he would have gone away for a month so I could just breathe. XH2 couldn't afford to do anything like this and requires too much constant attention and adulation to do anything solo or without an audience.
I realized that I've never been apart from a significant other longer than 2, possibly 3 weeks. I can't remember if my daughter and I went to Europe for 2 or 3 weeks. But, then again, I had been married to my XH1 for over 20 years at that point, and time apart is often very welcome at that point. LOL
SO and I had talked about me flying out to visit him at the end of his bike event, but his friend is riding with him and has planned a non-stop itinerary. Even though his friend encouraged him to bring me on out at any point, there really doesn't seem to be time in their schedule for me unless I want to participate in some grueling hike that is like a death march. I had even offered to fly out near the end of the trip to drive back with SO, but he didn't seem too keen on that, so I dropped it. At this point, airfare is going up and there seem to be a lot of insane people on airplanes of late.
And because SO doesn't like to be pinned down to particular dates for his itinerary (he's retired - he has no constraints), I'm going into this month assuming that I'll probably see him in early July, but I have no clue when he'll actually return. I'll keep myself occupied. It's an adjustment, but I think I'm up to the challenge. LMAO
I know it's not the end of the world. LOL And I am genuinely happy he's doing something that will be a whole lot of fun for him and physically challenging. He'll be on cloud 9 - this is so good for him. I want to be supportive because he would be VERY supportive of me if I wanted to do something like this.
I'm just keeping myself busy, keeping my expectations for communication very low because he will be busy and may not have wifi or cell phone signal. I'm sure if he wants to talk, I'll hear from him. But, I plan to just keep myself busy studying for a certification exam, spending time with my friends and taking care of things at my house. He's encouraged me to spend time at the mountain house while he's gone, and I will be up there two weekends this month with a friend and one of my kids. Being there will be "like" being with him, so it will help.