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Vacation, Daycare, and BM

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So when I had last posted, many people on her were upset about the fact that me and my bf were taking a trip to see my family when his work had ordered none of the people in his company to go anywhere, especially out of state. Lucky enough for us about 3 days before we left for our trip, my bf’s work said they were out of phase 0 and this no longer applied, but at that last minute it was too late to put in leave for my bf to come the whole time and for our pets to have care the whole week since we had only arranged for the weekends. All in all, it ended up for the best that he go back to work for Tuesday – Friday morning and that SD stay with me while he went back to work those few days because the night he got back, the daycare SD goes to sent an email saying due to limited staff and there were two classrooms a child displayed COVID symptoms they were closing for the foreseeable future. Neither of the classrooms were SD’s and they have been super strict not having the classrooms intermix or anything. So that left bf all week to have to speak to his work to figure out what could be done until September 1 because that was our only form of child care. Side note, then 4 days later the daycare emailed again saying that starting August 3, they would re-open to essential personnel only and since bf’s work had called before to get him on this list, we were back on the list so it is only this week bf has to “telework” and then SD will return to daycare on Monday.


Our trip to see my family was really good, everyone had a blast. We went to the beach several times and luckily the street we like to go there was hardly anyone so we could social distance and then we wore masks to enjoy the boardwalk for some food and some shopping. My bf and my dad got to bond a lot which they both really enjoyed. So all in all, it was a great trip, I was happy to spend time with my family especially my sister who is moving into college in a little over 2 weeks and once there is supposed to stay there till the semester is basically over.


Now on to BM. I know there is no way that BM knows, but her timing sucks. On my birthday, which is of course the day before hers, again she doesn’t know this, she messages asking to call SD the next day. So I was slightly irritated because I wanted to enjoy my day without any interruptions of BM, but it wasn’t that bad, just a slight annoyance. Then on our second day visiting my family, BM messages and asks when she can have SD to celebrate SD’s birthday, that she doubts it will be on the actual day, but she has family coming in for it and she needs to know now. Well bf told her that he didn’t know right now and when it got closer he would let her know. Then BM sends back a snotty response because she is not getting what she wants aka an answer that second then tries to sound like she knows better and says they will have to communicate as SD grows, it is just how it is, etc and is pestering to know when she can have SD. At this point bf and I are in general of course annoyed about her timing because it always is when we are doing something and absolutely don’t want to hear from her. Plus, bf does not have to give her SD at all till September 1 if he does not want to. So her being demanding and honestly a b***h and assuming we care whatsoever she has family coming in, got back a response that shut her up for the rest of the trip. We decided to say


“Obviously. I will let you know later down the road when you can have her to celebrate her birthday. It will not be on the day of her birthday and probably not be that week. You have her 10 months of the year, this is my time. Don’t act like I am making things difficult. If you want to keep asking when, then you can see her on September 1 and that will be that.”


Then yesterday, I told bf we need to decide when we are going to let BM have her because SD’s birthday is this Wednesday so she will probably message today (Tuesday) to ask when she can talk to SD on her birthday. So we decided next Friday from 4 pm until Saturday at 4 pm (so 24 hours) she can have SD to celebrate, but we didn’t message BM that. So today, surprise, surprise, BM messages asking when tomorrow she can talk to SD. So bf answered and then told her “You can pick up SD on August 7th at 4 pm and return SD to my residence on August 8th at 4 pm to celebrate her birthday with her.”


Luckily, BM just responds back “Ok. Thankyou.” So hopefully next weekend there is actually no drama regarding this whatsoever. I really don’t want BM anywhere near where we live, but I also do not want bf and I driving out of our way to drop off and pick up SD like has been going on the whole time. So since we live in an apartment building, bf will go down with SD a few minutes before BM is to arrive so she isn’t near our place, but also we didn’t make any extra effort. So we shall see how the visit goes. BM still faithfully calls only every 2 weeks and other than for her birthday has not asked to see SD or anything. Crossing our fingers there is no drama, especially since we are celebrating our 2 year anniversary while SD is with BM since our anniversary is on August 6. Needless to say, I am actually kind of happy that after September 1 we won’t have to be figuring out child care because it has been a rollercoaster on day care being open or closed, etc. I know everyone is dealing with this, but my bf’s command basically just thinks I should be taking off to take care of SD and no that is not how it works, I work 40 hours myself and sometimes out of town/traveling. Luckily, he is out of the military May 2021 too, that’ll make our lives a bit less stressful.