Letter - Does this sound good?
Please read below the draft of the letter we will be sending and let me know your thoughts. Thanks!
Dear BM,
All of my efforts to settle the matter pertaining to removing my name off of (BM’s child)'s birth certificate amicably have been unsuccessful. In January 2020, when you were requesting (BM's child)’s original birth certificate from me, I denied this request and re-informed you of the judge’s order at the October 2019 hearing to remove my name off of her birth certificate. Your response to the information was that you were proceeding to accomplish this task. On October 29, 2020 I requested a copy of (BM's child)'s corrected birth certificate to send to DEERS so I could remove her off of my Tricare health insurance plan. Shortly after on the same day, you informed me you had not begun the process to remove my name. This is unacceptable as it has been over a year since the genetic testing hearing on October 15, 2019 which proved via dna evidence that I am not her biological father and were verbally told by the Judge to correct the child’s birth certificate.
At this point in time I am concerned about health insurance fraud and could be charged by Tricare for all medical expenses my plan has covered for this child during the time she should not of remained on my medical plan. I have not had any contact with this child since October 2019, she is not included in any custody arrangements nor mentioned in any divorce paperwork as I was proven in court to not be her biological father. When negotiating the PSA that would be included in our final divorce decree, you would not agree to sign the PSA unless you were able to claim (SD) on your 2019 tax return so you could use the funds to finance the summer move outlined in the agreement. You have not moved out of state per your claim and could of used the funds to finance the birth certificate correction process, but instead give excuses to why this has not been done.
If you do not remove my name (bf) from (BM's child)’s birth certificate naming me as the father I will be forced to file in court and will be asking for reimbursement of court and attorney’s fees. As you have given your word before in January 2020 that you would correct this matter and have not, as well as the requirement by Tricare, I will also need a copy of the corrected birth certificate. In addition, if Tricare does charge me the amount of funds used to cover (BM's child)’s medical expenses, I will be pursing reimbursement from you for these as well.
While I regret it has had to come to this, you have left me no choice in the matter, but to pursue litigation.
Sincerely,
BF
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Comments
Getting there
A couple of points:
- Bullet points are easier to read. This is not just for BM, but also potentially the courts. Bullet pointing the content will make it easier to comprehend quickly.
- Grammatically, it's not 'could of,' 'should of,' etc. It should be 'could have,' 'should have,' etc. It's such a common mistake because that's how it sounds when spoken. But we want there to be nothing to distract from your facts.
Fingers are crossed for you!
Ah thank you!
Proably right on the bullets and as for the grammatically, I definitely forgot about that! Never have written a letter like this before and I am much better on the vocabulary/grammar part. We came up with together what we wanted in it, but then I wrote it up
I agree that bullet point
I agree that bullet point would be better. Keep it simple and in chonological order. I would also leave out this portion:
What she does with money isn't going to matter.
Okay
I figured it should be left out it is just so frustrating she refused to sign because she "needed" that money to "move" and never did and all her excuses are about "not having money" to do what she needs to do. However in september she was able to travel to another state for a month and maintain paying rent back in VA for the whole month gone so it is just frustrating the lies and excuses.
Oh I understand wanting to
Oh I understand wanting to get that dig in there!!
Has your BF checked to see if
Has your BF checked to see if BM has actually used Tri-Care for her older child since his parental rights were taken away? I would think he's the one getting the EOBs, and would know if she was. I would put something in the letter specifically directing her that she is not to use Tri-Care for the child and if she does SHE will be committing health care fraud and he will hold her responsible for any repayment required.
No he has not, but that is besides the point
The point is the child needs to be removed and he can't do it until she gets the birth certificate corrected. So we are sending a threatening letter advised by the attorney that she needs to do what is required of her by law.
I have always gotten the EOB
I have always gotten the EOB's for my kids from Tricare. They come to my house addressed to my exH.
We have never received a single
EOB since I have known him. That may be because he did not update his address through Tricare? Either way, whether BM is using the Tricare or not, the child needs to be removed and BM needs to remove bf's name from the birth certificate
In addition to the other
In addition to the other suggestions, I might make some changes to this sentence: At this point in time I am concerned about health insurance fraud and could be charged by Tricare for all medical expenses my plan has covered for this child during the time she should not of remained on my medical plan.
If BM is high-conflict, she won't care that your DH might be charged by Tricare. In fact, she might be thrilled to know that she has that power over him. Perhaps wording it to indicate that the concern is that SHE might commit healthcare fraud and that SHE would be required to reimburse any amounts that the plan paid out due to her negligence.
Yes! This is what I was
Yes! This is what I was trying to say above. The BF is not committing health care fraud - the BM would be if she uses TriCare knowing that she's not supposed to. BM should be put on notice that she's not allowed to use it and told it's health care fraud and she will have to pay anything that needs to be repaid. No need to say BF would have to pay it and then go after her, even if that's how it would actually work.
The lawyer
Was pretty specific about wording it this way. And since bf is the plan holder, he is actually the one Tricare will go after not Bm then bf will have to take bm to Court for those expenses