"It was an honest mistake"
Waiting around this week has been hard. The settlement agreement should of been received last Friday, bf's lawyer wanted to wait a week and then go from there. Today it has been a week, as far as we know, no response has been given to the agreement and BM has not brought up the agreement to my bf. Plan is to wait and see if his lawyer contacts him with any news, if not on Monday he will follow up with his lawyer and will probably be getting a court date. Honestly, at this point, even though more expensive and time consuming, I rather just have this court date made already because BM has not been wavering about agreeing to what my bf wants (primary custody for the school year, for those who have not read my previous blogs).
I do however, find it curious since the agreement was mailed to BM, that ALL of a sudden, now she has time for the girls, when in the past usually averages at 39% of the time, when it should be 50/50 is the temporary custody order. BM had them 4 days straight last week, Friday night - Tuesday morning (which worked for us because I had to go car shopping, was way easier without 2 children under 5), then she wanted them Wednesday afternoon - Thursday morning (again worked for us because it would be the last night we get alone before I go out of town for 4 days) and now she wants them Friday night - Sunday morning. I gently pointed out to my bf to be careful because we are already at 6 days of the month and only 8 days into May when usually she only gets them 12 days out of the month. So because of this and drop off would be at 8:15 pm Friday, he is dropping them off Saturday morning instead. I almost feel like she knows a court date is about to come up and she wants to look as though she can actually have the children at least 50% so she gets primary custody. So we will see what happens, but as the temporary order is 50/50 he should try to make sure she does not get the girls more than that. It is only her fault she did not have them her 50%, he has maybe in the 11 months I have known him, denied her 5 times? Either because we had plans with the girls already and her asking was last minute or because the time she was proposing to take them wasn't in the best interest for the kids. Again, just my opinion, we have been tracking dates/times she does get them.
On to why my blog title was titled "it was an honest mistake." So, yesterday morning, bf picks the kids up from BM and takes them to daycare. After daycare, we pick them up and we went to dinner. The whole time we were at dinner, the (4) year old was super itchy. I guess while they were at BM's they were outside and she never put bug spray on either child and the 4 y.o has 15-20 mosquito bites. I get it, kids are going to get bit, but seriously that many shouldn't be happening. Anyway, so we get home and are getting the kids ready for bed, the 4 y.o says she can't get her dress off, so I go to help her and I barely got the dress of myself and when I did, she had marks all over the upper half of her body from the dress being too tight. I look at the tag and it is a 2T dress, the child wears 4T - 5T depending on what it is. Also, she has pants on under the dress that falling off her butt and they are 5T. So bf texts BM because this is about the 5th time the 4 year old is wearing 2T clothing and says something along the lines of just so you know, *child* is 4.5 years old and wears 4T, not 2T. 2T clothing is for children that are 2 and 4T is for children who are 4 years old. Her response? It was an honest mistake, I did not know it was 2T. I know it was *2 year old child*s dress, but *4 year old child* wanted to wear it so I put it on her and put pants on her since it was short...........I know, I know, this isn't the end of the world to those of you who have told me before it is not enough to deem her unfit and it is just clothes, but this blatant stupidity, does not happen with my BF. Also makes us worried, this is just the things we notice, who knows what kind of stupidity happens over there?
Every time we get them back, have bruises and cuts/scrapes, nothing that suggests abuse, just suggests she doesn't pay attention to them. Yes, kids get scrapes, etc. it is more of the fact the scrapes aren't cleaned out on top of it all. A few weeks ago, the 4 y.o had a scraped up knee and it looked TERRIBLE, could tell it was never cleaned out.
Anyway, sorry that was so long, I am just sick of the waiting game and constant gray area and just want everything to be over with and solved. Let's hope that Monday there is a game plan from the lawyer on what is next.