So SD’s visit with BM on Friday/Saturday happened without any drama. BM did not message when she arrived at our apartment complex, but bf and SD were already downstairs and outside awaiting beforehand. BM messaged on Saturday saying she was leaving her place to bring SD back and that she washed the clothes we sent her in and was sending her back in them. Which was very surprising because back when we sent SD in our clothes or shoes, we never got them back. I purposefully picked clothing of ours that fit, but in a few months won’t fit so if we did not get the clothes back it would not be a big deal. We sent her in the shoes BM sent her in however. Honestly, she probably would have been sent in BM’s clothes if we could remember where we had put them after pick up on June 1. Bf checked SD for bruises, etc. since SD’s sister had been causing bruises/bite marks, etc. on her. Luckily there were none, however they have not seen each other for over 2 months so does not surprise me.

I am not going to get delusional and think that there will not be future drama from BM, however I am enjoying the lack of drama there is right now. If things still follow the same schedule of BM only calling SD once every two weeks, we only have one more phone call to get through this month. I guess the boundaries have really been paying off.

What will be interesting is what is going to happen after September 1. We are torn on what to do regarding the schedule. As of now BM is staying in VA. The lawyer advised to try and work something out with BM outside of court for while she is in the same state, so from September 1 - May 2021, if BM does not leave before us. My assumption would be if we asked BM for time while she is here she is going to want to set up an unofficial schedule, which is something we do not want, to let our schedule be dictated by her. Another concern we have been having since June 1 is child care. SD’s child care has closed 3 times for extended periods of time because of COVID. I work 40 hours a week, sometimes my schedule changing at the last minute, so when bf’s work puts him on 24 hour duty shits or if the day care closes that gives us a problem. We have no family close enough in distance to help and all of our friends also work 40 hour jobs. Do not want to get a different day care because a lot of their scheduling does not really help us and they are soooo much pricier. Plus with COVID, trying to avoid really mixing things up too much. I thought about bringing up to bf about asking BM to do every other weekend. That way we still get adult time, still get to see SD, but do not have to worry about child care, etc. His work has kind of been counting down till SD goes back to BM because bf cannot participate in all the missions, ranges, etc. that they want him to because of SD and not having child care (if day care is open they have ranges, etc. from 5 pm till 5 am, or mission trips out of state, and if day care is closed, then it causes even bigger problems). Plus bf does not want his work saying oh “futurestepmomnowstepgf can watch her,” because one it is not my responsibility and two when daycare opens, I already have to be at work an hour away or sometimes out of town on a job site. Although his work still tries to do it anyway and when it works out and isn't ridiculous I will do it. For example on Wednesday bf has a 24 hour range, so I will drop SD off at day care and pick her up from day care after my work day is done. Luckily, I work from home on Wednesdays which is why this works, but if it were Monday, Tuesday, or Friday, it would not work because I leave at 5:45 am.

Right now trying to just enjoy the quiet and hope it stays that way for at least a little while, but never relaxing the boundaries.