So as of this moment I do not have any updates on the genetic testing or any of this. The trial date for the temporary custody hearing is on October 15. So there are weeks that it can still be done. I did like someone's suggestion I believe it was on my last post about if my bf can go ahead and get the testing done, then ask for reimbursement. I am going to wait till the end of September to mention it to my bf however, give it a bit more time to see if BM is going to make the move or if she is really waiting till the very last second. Since the last showdown of BM sending threatening and harassing texts and my bf shutting her down with facts, she has not said much of anything, except asked if my bf would want to switch from week days of having the kids to the weekend. My bf paid to keep their spot in their school for almost 2 months of them never going since BM was denying him to see the children, so now at least they are going 2 days a week, makes the paying worth it, plus shows he is actively interested in continuing their education and socialization with their peers. Meanwhile, we found out BM has the children's grandmother as their caregiver and they are not going to school like BM said, never over text of course so that should of been the first clue she was making it all up.

Anyway, on to the feeling guilty part of this blog. I feel slightly guilty because for the past two months, I have been able to have so much one on one time with my bf since he has not been the primary caregiver since around July 4. Not that we did not get any before, just waaaay more of it now. It has given us time to focus on our relationship a lot and build it like a normal couple. We got to go visit my family for a few days, spend time with my friends, and our friends together without having to worry about a babysitter. So it has been really nice. Now we are seeing them 2 nights and 3 days a week, this week being the 3rd week of this arrangement. I look forward to seeing them, but I did tell my bf one of those nights I will be spending at my place. 1. so he can have one on one time with the kids, 2. right before BM took the kids and since then, the 4 year old, wakes up crying and getting out of bed at least once a night. As I am a light sleeper, I wake up to it first, then wake up my bf and he deals with it. But on top of it waking me up, usually afterwards I have a really hard time falling back asleep. Plus I work at least 40 hours a week, while my bf if he doesn't sleep well, unless he has a range, he has the opportunity to take a nap and catch up on sleep whereas I do not. 3. I am trying to not get emotionally attached to the older child as all this genetic testing stuff is going to happen, but it is so hard when she always asks for me, asks about me, etc. she is more attached to me than my bf, so I think a little space is good for everyone emotionally.

So because of these three things, I feel a little guilty, but I can't really share any of these thoughts with my bf, because I do not want to make him feel bad or think I am celebrating him not being the primary parent, it is simply, we didn't get the opportunity to grow our relationship like a normal couple, I need uninterrupted sleep, and I don't want to make this situation any harder on anyone emotionally. So thanks for listening! Also, my bf immediately respected my decision about one night at my place when he has the kids and did not get mad or make me feel bad about it. So I really appreciate that.