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Finally Permanently Rid of SD15

frustrated-mom's picture

Well, the saga with SD15 is finally over. She’s going to go live with her BM’s brother and his wife. DH is filing the paperwork to give them guardianship of her so they can enroll her in school.

SD15 had been staying with her adult half-siblings for the summer and it was so calm, quiet and non-stressful without her around. I was dreading her returning.

I've had it with her behavior and am no longer going to accept it.

So I gave my DH an ultimatum that she can’t return to our home until she complies with a few very simple things - agrees to treat me with decency and respect and apologizes, signs the Home Rules Contract we put together and agrees to accept the consequences. It’s my home, if she wants to live here, she’s going to follow my rules.

But SD15 is adamant that does not want to return to our home, will not do any of the requirements and she wants nothing to do with her father or me. Since I want nothing to do with her, I suppose it all works out.

So, DH let her go live with her uncle as a compromise. I wish she had been sent to a boarding school or camp where she would learn how to behave like a decent person and treat people with respect, but unfortunately he wimped out.

Her uncle said that if she puts one toe out of line or gets bad grades, he’s putting her on a plane to go back to live with her dad and me, which is the only thing that will possibly motivate her. Hopefully, she does well and I never have to deal with her again.

It never worked out with her living with us, so it’s all for the best. SD is happier being closer to her hometown and with relatives she cares about and has a bond with, and our home is far more peaceful without her here.

Comments

mcnat's picture

Congratulations! My DH was supposed to sign his rights to his "daughter" away today but we are waiting for her SD to decide whether or not to adopt her. He won't. It has been so peaceful not having her here! I bet it feels great to actually be able to sleep at night! Hope things continue to go good for ya'll! Don't feel bad either. I am convinced that someone sneaks into the houses of teenage girls and puts the "asshole" tablet in their shampoo at night! Smile

starfish's picture

good stuff, fm....... something i could only dream about with my sd...

congrats!!

Bex_S's picture

OMG I could only wish that we could ship off brat SD and have her be someone else's problem. I suppose I can count myself lucky that because of her behaviour and because we have a bio now (so I can't be SD's free taxi anymore), we only have her alternate weekends. We had her alternate weeks before that...God knows how I coped having her here all week. What's your secret?! Haha. If only there was a cut and dry way of getting rid of unwanted SDs...

Siemprematahari's picture

But SD15 is adamant that does not want to return to our home, will not do any of the requirements and she wants nothing to do with her father or me. Since I want nothing to do with her, I suppose it all works out.

I'd consider this a win in my book!!! Good riddance and let her uncle have a go at it. If she steps out of line, back to her mother she goes. Your house is not an option since she's not willing to follow rules or respect.

 

todd5851's picture

I had that glorious time last year when SD14 (at the time) hated her mom and wanted to live out of state with BioD.  That lasted until she got a taste of the crappy schools and begged her mom to take her back after 1 week.  Sadly, she came back home and my wife ended putting her in private school and costing us a lot of money!  Hopefully your situation will end better than mine.