How to adress my husband about our relationship and SD
My husband and I have been married for one year. He has a 16 year old daughter with his ex wife who is not high conflict at all but rarely sees her daughter because of her work schedule and traveling so much. My SD was 14 when I met her.. she’s a pretty cool kid and I like hanging out with her since she’s very mature for her age. My husband and I didn’t go on a honeymoon because we eloped last minute in Vegas and considered that our “mini-moon” I’ve been recently hinting about a trip to ourselves but my husband tells me it’s difficult with my SD’s packed schedule. About a month ago we got in a argument about our family vacation that happens every year with the in-laws. Every year we go to Houston to have a big family get together. Since we have a timeshare I asked my husband if we could have a “house” to ourselves and put my SD with his sister. He told me that the siblings and the kids always shared a house and it was the only time they got to bond. I was quite irritated so I told him to stop putting his daughter and sister before me. He told me that his daughter would always come first and I understood because my dad raised me the same way and my stemom resented me for that. I didn’t want to become overly jealous of my SD and I started developing those feelings towards her. My husband has been distant lately and I’ve apologized and he said everything was ok but he’s not as close to me as we were before. I’ve been going to therapy and it’s helped but my resentment towards my SD has increased and i feel like I’m turning into my SM. Recently my SD asked her dad to come with her to North Carolina (my husbands mom lives there) this year because of a family renunion. My husband has a strained relationship with his biomother but wants his daughter to have one with her grandma so she gets sent every year. I turned the offer down and said I couldn’t take the days off (which is a lie) i just don’t want to take anything out to my SD. Yesterday, I was in the car with my Sd and she told me she wish I came and started ranting about how fun the reunion was. I got a little mad and snapped. I told her that she should just have fun with her dad and that I need vacation to myself and i could never because of her. She was quiet the way home and of course told her dad what happened. Now my husband is not talking to me and I’m scared that I ruined our relationship. I love my SD but Im constantly jealous of her!!